December 14, 2003
Dearest Dave,
I went to the door today, and the postman delivered a ヤマウズラ, 刺青, パートリッジ in a 梨 tree. This was a delightful gift! I couldn't have been もっと見る surprised または pleased darling!
With truly the deepest love,
Agnes
December 15, 2003
Dearest Dave,
Today the postman brought me yet another of your sweet gifts. The two turtule doves that arrived today are adorable, and I'm delighted によって your thoughtful and generous ways.
With all of my love,
Your Agnes
December 16, 2003
Dearest Dave,
You've truly been too kind! I must protest; I don't deserve such generosity. The thought of getting three French hens amazes me. Yet, I am not surprised--what もっと見る should I expect from such a nice person.
Love,
Agnes
December 17, 2003
Dear Dave,
Four calling birds arrived in the mail today. They are truly nice but don't あなた think that enough is enough? あなた are being too romantic.
Affectionately,
Agnes
December 18, 2003
Dearest darling Dave,
It was a surprise to get five golden rings! I now have one for every finger. あなた truly are impossible darling, yet oh how I 愛 it! Quite frankly, all of those squarking birds from the 前 days were starting to get on my nerves. Yet, あなた managed to come through with a beautiful valuable gift!
All my love,
Agnes
December 19, 2003
Dear Dave,
When I opened my door, there were actually six geese a-laying on my front steps. So you're back to the birds again, huh? Those geese are dear, but where will I keep them? The neighbors are complaining, and I am unable to sleep with all the racket. Please stop dear.
Cordially,
Agnes
December 20, 2003
Dave,
What is with あなた and those stupid birds!? Seven swans a-swimming!! What kind of sick joke is this!!?? There are bird droppings everywhere! They never shut up, and I don't get any sleep!!! I'm a nervous wreck! It's not funny あなた weirdo, so stop with the birds.
Sincerely,
Agnes
December 21, 2003
O.K. wise guy,
The birds were bad enough. Now what do あなた expect me to do with eight maids a-milking? If that's not bad enough, they had to bring their cows!! The front lawn was completely ruined によって them, and I can't 移動する in my own house! Just lay off me または you'll be sorry!
Agnes
December 22, 2003
こんにちは loser,
What are you? あなた must be some kind of sadist!! Now there are nine pipers playing, and they certainly do play! They haven't stopped chasing those maids since they got here! The cows are getting upset, and they're stepping all over those screeching birds. The neighbors are getting up a petition to evict me, and I'm going out of my mind!
You'll get yours!
Agnes
December 23, 2003
あなた rotten scum!!!
There are now ten ladies dancing! There is only one problem with that! They're dancing twenty-four hours a 日 all around me with the pipers upsetting the cows and the maids. The cows can't sleep, and they are going to the bathroom everywhere! The building commissioner has subpoenaed me to give cause as to why the house shouldn't be condemned! I can't even think of a reason! あなた creep! I'm sicking the police on you!
One who means it!
December 24, 2003
Listen あなた evil, sadistic, maniac!
What's with the eleven lords-a-leaping?!? They are leaping across the rooms breaking everything and even injuring some of the maids! The place smells, is an absolute mad house, and is about to be condemned! At least the birds are quiet; they were trampled to death によって the cows. I hope あなた are satisfied--you rotten vicious worthless piece of garbage!
Your sworn enemy,
Agnes
December 25, 2003
The Law Offices of
Badger, Rees, and Yorker
20 Knave Street
Chicago, Illinois
Dear sir,
This is to acknowledge your latest gift of twelve fiddlers-fiddling which あなた have seen fit to inflict on our client, one Agnes Mcholstein. The destruction of course was total. If あなた attempt to reach Ms. Mcholstein at Happy Daze Sanatarium, the attendants have instructions to shoot あなた on site.
Please direct all correspondence to this office in the future. With this letter, please find attached a warrant for your arrest.
Cordially,
Badger, Rees, and Yorker
Dearest Dave,
I went to the door today, and the postman delivered a ヤマウズラ, 刺青, パートリッジ in a 梨 tree. This was a delightful gift! I couldn't have been もっと見る surprised または pleased darling!
With truly the deepest love,
Agnes
December 15, 2003
Dearest Dave,
Today the postman brought me yet another of your sweet gifts. The two turtule doves that arrived today are adorable, and I'm delighted によって your thoughtful and generous ways.
With all of my love,
Your Agnes
December 16, 2003
Dearest Dave,
You've truly been too kind! I must protest; I don't deserve such generosity. The thought of getting three French hens amazes me. Yet, I am not surprised--what もっと見る should I expect from such a nice person.
Love,
Agnes
December 17, 2003
Dear Dave,
Four calling birds arrived in the mail today. They are truly nice but don't あなた think that enough is enough? あなた are being too romantic.
Affectionately,
Agnes
December 18, 2003
Dearest darling Dave,
It was a surprise to get five golden rings! I now have one for every finger. あなた truly are impossible darling, yet oh how I 愛 it! Quite frankly, all of those squarking birds from the 前 days were starting to get on my nerves. Yet, あなた managed to come through with a beautiful valuable gift!
All my love,
Agnes
December 19, 2003
Dear Dave,
When I opened my door, there were actually six geese a-laying on my front steps. So you're back to the birds again, huh? Those geese are dear, but where will I keep them? The neighbors are complaining, and I am unable to sleep with all the racket. Please stop dear.
Cordially,
Agnes
December 20, 2003
Dave,
What is with あなた and those stupid birds!? Seven swans a-swimming!! What kind of sick joke is this!!?? There are bird droppings everywhere! They never shut up, and I don't get any sleep!!! I'm a nervous wreck! It's not funny あなた weirdo, so stop with the birds.
Sincerely,
Agnes
December 21, 2003
O.K. wise guy,
The birds were bad enough. Now what do あなた expect me to do with eight maids a-milking? If that's not bad enough, they had to bring their cows!! The front lawn was completely ruined によって them, and I can't 移動する in my own house! Just lay off me または you'll be sorry!
Agnes
December 22, 2003
こんにちは loser,
What are you? あなた must be some kind of sadist!! Now there are nine pipers playing, and they certainly do play! They haven't stopped chasing those maids since they got here! The cows are getting upset, and they're stepping all over those screeching birds. The neighbors are getting up a petition to evict me, and I'm going out of my mind!
You'll get yours!
Agnes
December 23, 2003
あなた rotten scum!!!
There are now ten ladies dancing! There is only one problem with that! They're dancing twenty-four hours a 日 all around me with the pipers upsetting the cows and the maids. The cows can't sleep, and they are going to the bathroom everywhere! The building commissioner has subpoenaed me to give cause as to why the house shouldn't be condemned! I can't even think of a reason! あなた creep! I'm sicking the police on you!
One who means it!
December 24, 2003
Listen あなた evil, sadistic, maniac!
What's with the eleven lords-a-leaping?!? They are leaping across the rooms breaking everything and even injuring some of the maids! The place smells, is an absolute mad house, and is about to be condemned! At least the birds are quiet; they were trampled to death によって the cows. I hope あなた are satisfied--you rotten vicious worthless piece of garbage!
Your sworn enemy,
Agnes
December 25, 2003
The Law Offices of
Badger, Rees, and Yorker
20 Knave Street
Chicago, Illinois
Dear sir,
This is to acknowledge your latest gift of twelve fiddlers-fiddling which あなた have seen fit to inflict on our client, one Agnes Mcholstein. The destruction of course was total. If あなた attempt to reach Ms. Mcholstein at Happy Daze Sanatarium, the attendants have instructions to shoot あなた on site.
Please direct all correspondence to this office in the future. With this letter, please find attached a warrant for your arrest.
Cordially,
Badger, Rees, and Yorker
Bill, Jim, and Scott were at a convention together and were sharing a large suite on the 上, ページのトップへ of a 75 story sky scraper. After a long 日 of meetings they were shocked to hear that the elevators in their hotel were broken and they would have to climb 75 flights of stairs to get to their room. Bill 発言しました to Jim and Scott, let's break the monotony of this unpleasant task によって concentrating on something interesting. I'll tell jokes for 25 flights, and Jim can sing songs for 25 flights, and Scott can tell sad stories the rest of the way. At the 26th floor Bill stopped telling jokes and Jim began to sing. At the 51st floor Jim stopped 歌う and Scott began to tell sad stories. "I will tell my saddest story first," he said. "I left the room key in the car!"
Almost every week, BBC publishes 10 things we learn every week. Here are the facts from this week.
1. iPhones are not yet sold in China.
2. Margaret Thatcher suffered one Parliamentary defeat as Prime Minister - on Sunday trading laws.
3. English holidaymakers drink an average of eight alcoholic drinks a day.
4. The UK population grew in もっと見る 2008 than at any time since 1962.
5. Meanwhile, Germany's population is shrinking.
6. West Ham's stadium is really called the Boleyn Ground, not Upton Park.
7. The smell of cut 草 makes people happy.
8. A pint glass lasts an average of only three months.
9. An Englishman sailed to the "New World" only two years after the first European is thought to have landed in Newfoundland.
10. Men in China cannot marry until they are 22.
Hopefully there will be もっと見る 次 week.
1. iPhones are not yet sold in China.
2. Margaret Thatcher suffered one Parliamentary defeat as Prime Minister - on Sunday trading laws.
3. English holidaymakers drink an average of eight alcoholic drinks a day.
4. The UK population grew in もっと見る 2008 than at any time since 1962.
5. Meanwhile, Germany's population is shrinking.
6. West Ham's stadium is really called the Boleyn Ground, not Upton Park.
7. The smell of cut 草 makes people happy.
8. A pint glass lasts an average of only three months.
9. An Englishman sailed to the "New World" only two years after the first European is thought to have landed in Newfoundland.
10. Men in China cannot marry until they are 22.
Hopefully there will be もっと見る 次 week.
1) Pay the ring bearer a dollar to pick his/her nose during the ceremony.
2) Laugh hysterically the whole time while the vows are being said.
3) Pay the 花 girl a dollar to heap the petals on the floor, and walk in front of the bride with the basket on her head.
4) Play a heavy metal song in your portable CD player during the procession. Make sure あなた disabled the piano/organ first.
5) Walk around, handing other guests copies of embarrassing pictures of your cousin, who is the one getting married.
6) Get your best friend to call あなた repeatedly during the ceremony. Make sure あなた set your ringtone to an irritating tone.
7) Paint yourself purple for the occasion.
8) "Trip" and spill チョコレート fondue all over the bride.
9) Put a "kick me, I'm making a stupid 移動する によって getting married" sign on the groom's back.
10) "Invite" a pit bull.
2) Laugh hysterically the whole time while the vows are being said.
3) Pay the 花 girl a dollar to heap the petals on the floor, and walk in front of the bride with the basket on her head.
4) Play a heavy metal song in your portable CD player during the procession. Make sure あなた disabled the piano/organ first.
5) Walk around, handing other guests copies of embarrassing pictures of your cousin, who is the one getting married.
6) Get your best friend to call あなた repeatedly during the ceremony. Make sure あなた set your ringtone to an irritating tone.
7) Paint yourself purple for the occasion.
8) "Trip" and spill チョコレート fondue all over the bride.
9) Put a "kick me, I'm making a stupid 移動する によって getting married" sign on the groom's back.
10) "Invite" a pit bull.
The Mew Pudding goes "Na no da"
20. プリン Fon "Tokyo mew mew" The cuties character in the アニメ she's hyper, active and has the best 愛 interest despite not being the main character and only eight years old.
19.Hiei from "Yu Yu Hakusho" Hiei has the darkest life. He was thrown off a cliff as a child, torn from his family, ロスト the only thing he had of them and then his sister was captured によって the UGLIEST of all fat greedy bastards. No not the one from Disney's "Pocahontas".
18.Snow White from "Snow White And The Seven Dwarfs" The most innocent of the ディズニー princess naive,...
continue reading...
19.Hiei from "Yu Yu Hakusho" Hiei has the darkest life. He was thrown off a cliff as a child, torn from his family, ロスト the only thing he had of them and then his sister was captured によって the UGLIEST of all fat greedy bastards. No not the one from Disney's "Pocahontas".
A sucky life gave him an attitude everyone loves
18.Snow White from "Snow White And The Seven Dwarfs" The most innocent of the ディズニー princess naive,...
#9 Have one of your フレンズ hit あなた on the back and spit out a piece of white gum または a tic-tak, this will make people think they broke your tooth.
#8 Go to the mall and ask people if they have change for the payphone. Don't stop until あなた have $20 または more.
#7 If あなた have to write a story for English class, write: Once upon a time, The end, and turn it in.
#6 After a lesson, if the teacher ask if there are any questions, ask something completely randon like "Where do 赤ちゃん come from?"
#5 If the teacher leaves during the middle of a movie, get up and change the channel to Spongebob または 音楽 videos.
#4 Go around 歌う the Free Credit Report.com songs.
#3 Go around hitting people on the head and say: "Could've had a v8."
#2 Get a bra and use it to shoot eggs at people.
#1 When the intercom comes on, drop to your knees and yell, "NO! It's those voices again!
