I found this hilarious 一覧 on bellaandedward.com. Enjoy :)
Things Bella Would Never Say
1) Edward, drive faster! (Sent in by: Michelle)
2) Edward, I hate あなた and I don't 愛 あなた any more. (Sent in by: McKenna)
3) I hate Edward (Sent in by: Emma)
4) Charlie, could あなた cook dinner? (Sent in by: Jade)
5) Lets go live in Florida! (Sent in by: Brenna)
6) I'm in 愛 with Sam Uley. (Sent in by: Brenna)
7) あなた know what, I think this is only a crush, Edward! (Sent in by: Brooke)
8) Give me a makeover Alice! (Sent in by: Riza)
9) Mike is the hottest guy on earth! (Sent in by: Lilyn)
10) Edward -- I'm sorry, but I don't 愛 あなた anymore. I've realized that my true 愛 is Mike Newton. (Sent in by: Andy)
11) こんにちは Edward, can あなた go bite Jacob? (Sent in by: Alex)
12) I've decided I don't want to become a vampire anymore. (Sent in by: Stephanie)
13) Good god Edward, あなた and I are both so perfectly tanned! (Sent in by: Mia)
14) Well, since I obviously smell so good to the vamps, maybe Jasper and I can hook up. 次 on my list: Carlisle and Emmett! (Sent in by: Courtney)
15) I think I'll just stay human. (Sent in by: Chris)
16) I don't want to be a vampire anymore. I enjoy being a human too much. (Sent in by: Megan)
17) Edward, I absoltuly hate the color of your eyes.
18) キッス me, Mike! (Sent in by: Brianna)
19) Oh my god Edward! You're a vampire?! (Sent in by: Maddy)
20) Sorry Edward, I just used あなた to get to know Emmett. (Sent in by: Lilyn)
21) OH MY GOD. A vampire? And a WEREWOLF?! *runs away screaming frantically* (Sent in by: Phoebe)
22) Let's race! (Sent in by: Gabby)
23) I'm sorry Edward but I am just too coordinated to hang with あなた (Sent in by: Alexis)
24) Edward, I would just 愛 it if あなた had red eyes! (Sent in by: Laura)
25) No Edward! Don't bite me! (Sent in by: Laura)
26) Alice, I hate あなた and あなた can't be my maid of honour! (Sent in by: Laura)
27) I wish Tyler had taken me to the prom (Sent in by: Laura)
Edward. I'm sorry, I just can't be with あなた anymore. I'm going back to Jacob, he still has a heartbeat. (Sent in by: Whitney)
28) Edward, will あなた bite me? I want to know what my blood tastes Edward, I don't want to be a vampire. And I'm going to go ask Aro to kill me. Adios, amigo! (Sent in by: Sara)
29) I wish あなた wouldn't breathe on me Edward - your breath stinks! (Sent in by: Sarah)
30) I'm going to the ビーチ to get a tan! (Sent in by: Ella)
31) I rock at ALL sports! (Sent in by: Katie)
32) Mmm, delicious spaghetti, Dad! (Sent in by: Brenna)
33) Edward, let's go party! (Sent in by: Alysha)
34) I want a BIG wedding! (Sent in by: Mackenzie and Jennifer)
35) あなた know, why did あなた have to kill James? I really loved him あなた know! (Sent in by: Bubbles and Pussycat)
36) Can we pleeeeeeeeease go play sports? (Sent in by: India)
I'm sorry Edward, but I'm seriously considering going and marrying Jacob tommorow. Hope あなた don't mind. (Sent in by: Morgan)
37) Mike Newton is a stud muffin! (Sent in by: Jennifer)
38) あなた feeling alright Edward? Cause you're looking kinda pale... (Sent in by: Laura)
39) Alice, lets have a sleepover. We can paint our nails, and do our hair, and even spend money! (Sent in by: Samm44)
40) Edward, I just dated あなた to get the coupe. Sorry. (Sent in by: Sam)
41) Edward, あなた are the cheese to my macaroni. (Sent in by: Allie)
42) Alice, あなた throw the best parties!! I 愛 them!! (Sent in by: Lauren)
43) Y'know, when I jumped off that cliff? I really was trying to commit suicide. (Sent in by: Doriz)
44) こんにちは Edward, how about あなた go with Esme and I hook up with Carlisle. (Sent in by: Samara)
45) Edward, I used あなた to get Jacob. (Sent in by: Alysha)
46) Let's go to the PROM, Edward!! (Sent in by: Charlotte)
47) Eddy, I'm thinking of dying my hair blonde and going the cheerleaders, whatca think? (Sent in by: Amy)
48) I was thinking we could honeymoon on the ビーチ in Hawaii! (Sent in by: Kelsey)
49) あなた know Edward, I think when I'm a vampire we should get a dog! (Sent in by: Shelby)
50) Edward, I think it's really creepy how あなた watch me when I sleep. Please stop. (Sent in by: Alice)
Things Bella Would Never Say
1) Edward, drive faster! (Sent in by: Michelle)
2) Edward, I hate あなた and I don't 愛 あなた any more. (Sent in by: McKenna)
3) I hate Edward (Sent in by: Emma)
4) Charlie, could あなた cook dinner? (Sent in by: Jade)
5) Lets go live in Florida! (Sent in by: Brenna)
6) I'm in 愛 with Sam Uley. (Sent in by: Brenna)
7) あなた know what, I think this is only a crush, Edward! (Sent in by: Brooke)
8) Give me a makeover Alice! (Sent in by: Riza)
9) Mike is the hottest guy on earth! (Sent in by: Lilyn)
10) Edward -- I'm sorry, but I don't 愛 あなた anymore. I've realized that my true 愛 is Mike Newton. (Sent in by: Andy)
11) こんにちは Edward, can あなた go bite Jacob? (Sent in by: Alex)
12) I've decided I don't want to become a vampire anymore. (Sent in by: Stephanie)
13) Good god Edward, あなた and I are both so perfectly tanned! (Sent in by: Mia)
14) Well, since I obviously smell so good to the vamps, maybe Jasper and I can hook up. 次 on my list: Carlisle and Emmett! (Sent in by: Courtney)
15) I think I'll just stay human. (Sent in by: Chris)
16) I don't want to be a vampire anymore. I enjoy being a human too much. (Sent in by: Megan)
17) Edward, I absoltuly hate the color of your eyes.
18) キッス me, Mike! (Sent in by: Brianna)
19) Oh my god Edward! You're a vampire?! (Sent in by: Maddy)
20) Sorry Edward, I just used あなた to get to know Emmett. (Sent in by: Lilyn)
21) OH MY GOD. A vampire? And a WEREWOLF?! *runs away screaming frantically* (Sent in by: Phoebe)
22) Let's race! (Sent in by: Gabby)
23) I'm sorry Edward but I am just too coordinated to hang with あなた (Sent in by: Alexis)
24) Edward, I would just 愛 it if あなた had red eyes! (Sent in by: Laura)
25) No Edward! Don't bite me! (Sent in by: Laura)
26) Alice, I hate あなた and あなた can't be my maid of honour! (Sent in by: Laura)
27) I wish Tyler had taken me to the prom (Sent in by: Laura)
Edward. I'm sorry, I just can't be with あなた anymore. I'm going back to Jacob, he still has a heartbeat. (Sent in by: Whitney)
28) Edward, will あなた bite me? I want to know what my blood tastes Edward, I don't want to be a vampire. And I'm going to go ask Aro to kill me. Adios, amigo! (Sent in by: Sara)
29) I wish あなた wouldn't breathe on me Edward - your breath stinks! (Sent in by: Sarah)
30) I'm going to the ビーチ to get a tan! (Sent in by: Ella)
31) I rock at ALL sports! (Sent in by: Katie)
32) Mmm, delicious spaghetti, Dad! (Sent in by: Brenna)
33) Edward, let's go party! (Sent in by: Alysha)
34) I want a BIG wedding! (Sent in by: Mackenzie and Jennifer)
35) あなた know, why did あなた have to kill James? I really loved him あなた know! (Sent in by: Bubbles and Pussycat)
36) Can we pleeeeeeeeease go play sports? (Sent in by: India)
I'm sorry Edward, but I'm seriously considering going and marrying Jacob tommorow. Hope あなた don't mind. (Sent in by: Morgan)
37) Mike Newton is a stud muffin! (Sent in by: Jennifer)
38) あなた feeling alright Edward? Cause you're looking kinda pale... (Sent in by: Laura)
39) Alice, lets have a sleepover. We can paint our nails, and do our hair, and even spend money! (Sent in by: Samm44)
40) Edward, I just dated あなた to get the coupe. Sorry. (Sent in by: Sam)
41) Edward, あなた are the cheese to my macaroni. (Sent in by: Allie)
42) Alice, あなた throw the best parties!! I 愛 them!! (Sent in by: Lauren)
43) Y'know, when I jumped off that cliff? I really was trying to commit suicide. (Sent in by: Doriz)
44) こんにちは Edward, how about あなた go with Esme and I hook up with Carlisle. (Sent in by: Samara)
45) Edward, I used あなた to get Jacob. (Sent in by: Alysha)
46) Let's go to the PROM, Edward!! (Sent in by: Charlotte)
47) Eddy, I'm thinking of dying my hair blonde and going the cheerleaders, whatca think? (Sent in by: Amy)
48) I was thinking we could honeymoon on the ビーチ in Hawaii! (Sent in by: Kelsey)
49) あなた know Edward, I think when I'm a vampire we should get a dog! (Sent in by: Shelby)
50) Edward, I think it's really creepy how あなた watch me when I sleep. Please stop. (Sent in by: Alice)
God and His priests and His kings
All were waiting
All will wait
As they go over
Mmm, held between heaven and hell
As they're dancing
As they dance over and over
Over
Cold
Cold
Crimson and bare as I stand
Yours completely
Yours as we go over
Sing for the lion and 子羊, ラム
Their hearts are hunting
Still hearts hold ever and ever
Ever
Cold
Cold
God and His priests and His kings
Turn their faces
Even they feel the cold
Ooooooh, ooooooh
What あなた are given
Can't be forgotten
And never forsaken
What あなた are given
Can't be forgotten
And never forsaken
What あなた are given
Can't be forgotten
Cold
All were waiting
All will wait
As they go over
Mmm, held between heaven and hell
As they're dancing
As they dance over and over
Over
Cold
Cold
Crimson and bare as I stand
Yours completely
Yours as we go over
Sing for the lion and 子羊, ラム
Their hearts are hunting
Still hearts hold ever and ever
Ever
Cold
Cold
God and His priests and His kings
Turn their faces
Even they feel the cold
Ooooooh, ooooooh
What あなた are given
Can't be forgotten
And never forsaken
What あなた are given
Can't be forgotten
And never forsaken
What あなた are given
Can't be forgotten
Cold