Play with your food; to add effect, act like it's a special performance for the people at the 次 table.
Turn around every thirty-seven 秒 to the people at the 次 表, テーブル and ask them if your シート, 座席 is too close, if you're talking too loud, etc.
Whenever あなた see someone getting up and leaving, bolt to their 表, テーブル and take the tip before the wait-person returns.
Eat REALLY loud; make disgusting noises; slurp EVERY time あなた take a sip of your drink.
Constantly re-adjust the positions of absolutely EVERYTHING at your table; seats, silverware, dishes, the 表, テーブル itself; and make sure to make...
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