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Wow, what is this now? Now I know what we’re all thinking. Is this supposed to be an in-season April Fools joke? Is this like an epic prank gone wrong gone sexual? This can’t truly be, Nik. You’re not really going to tell us about the actual intelligence of this film. No…. I’m dead serious. This is a review of the film, a review that actually talks about Freddy Got Fingered… But positively. Yes. Really. So this film has been considered not just one of the worst films of the decade, not just one of the worst comedies ever, but it’s also been considered one of the worst 映画 of all time, with scathing reviews from all outlets and critics, and won many razzies including Worst Actor, Worst Director, Worst Couple, and more, which this film won nine of from the Golden Raspberries alone. However, something strange happened. Freddy Got Fingered got considered a cult classic. And not just a cult classic, but has gained re-evaluation in later years and is actually considered ahead of its time now. What happened? What made Freddy Got Fingered into a film worthy of re-evaluation. But before I ruin all my credibility in the span of a single article, we need to discuss some things. First off, the act of Dada



So the movement of Dada, または Dadaism is a very complicated series of things. The origins are vague at best, and the movement hasn’t really been seen much outside of small niche audiences. Thank あなた to the video on Freddy Got Fingered によって Nostalgia Woman and Kyle Kallgran, who brought up this ideology for the movie, so if あなた want a better idea on that, there あなた go. I won’t go into the long, long, long history that is this movement, so I’ll try to keep things simple. Basically, Dada was a form of, debatably, expression artform that was described as anti-art, a form of taking an art and making it something so… nonsensical. It derives its medium from sheer chaos, made to shock, offend, または just confuse the general audience in some way. The act was not really respected at the time, with many of the art forms being banned when it first came, with even some artists being arrested for it. And with World War II, many of them were forced out of ヨーロッパ with the rise of Axis powers, even Hitler considering it a degenerate artform. Look, Adolf, you’re just salty cause あなた didn’t get to go to art school. Point is, after World War II ended and brought about a もっと見る optimistic look to the future, the cynical nature of Dadaism died out, at least for a time. After that, musical artists like Chumbawamba and Frank Zappa were considered self-Dadaists in the form of making nonsensical stuff, and in the case of Chumbawamba, did it to shock and offend. Yeah, あなた know the song, Tubthumping. Probably heard it in a ton of 映画 in the 90s and early 2000s? Yeah, that same band had an album where the cover had a baby popping out of the womb. I am not making this joke. So, to keep it simple, the art is all about offending. If あなた are offended, it worked. But what also lied in the art form of just sheer madness also lied a sense of nihilism. While the point of the art is to be pointless, that’s kind of the meaning to it. There is no point to the art. And after World War I, the deadliest war that humanity had known at the time, artists kind of wondered what the point of anything was. So, in writing, in their art, in music, Dada was not just an act of offending and shocking for laughs, but to also drive ホーム the fact that life is pointless and just bad. And, yeah, while that sort of nihilism isn’t exactly something I agree with, I perfectly understand it here. And yet, that movement would inspire so much work later on. From the aforementioned Frank Zappa and Chumbawamba, many nihilist authors and writers, and would create the strange surrealist sense of humor that we kind of toil in now… But we’ll get to that later. For now, now that we understand this point, this strange point of pointlessness, let us discuss the man himself. The star, writer and the bastard of Canada himself, Tom Green.

Part 1: Tom Green, Make Me Qreem



Tom Green is an… interesting fellow, to say the least. Aside from being a comedian that was made to put ランダム things in his mouth, walk up to people in the streets just to shock them completely, even making a big publicity of his actual, real testicular cancer that he thankfully beat and making a big stunt on Saturday Night Live where he was to marry his then-fiance Drew Barrymore live at the end, only for her to not 表示する up at the 表示する and just end, confusing so many viewers. Honestly, if not for the fact that Tom Green’s humor is… fucking disgusting, to say the least, the man is kind of inspirational. And I… never grew up with him. I tried asking my older brother, the most 90s kid guy I know. Yep, 90s kid. He’s 26 now. But yeah, he never knew him. I never knew him. The most I ever knew of Tom Green was that one cameo he had in Clone High, the pinnacle of human achievement. But the Tom Green 表示する on MTV was considered a landmark, for many great gags like Tom Green painting レズビアン on his dad's car, putting a cows head in his dads bed, basically just tormenting his parents on live TV, among all sorts of acts that クロス the line from “Is that okay for TV?” to “Is that even okay on a moral level?”. But a landmark nonetheless, as Tom Green’s antics would actually inspire another 表示する of idiots hurting themselves and pranking each other for the entertainment of redneck Americans world wide, myself included. That 表示する was Jackass. But his career was just getting started. Tom Green had finally made it big in Hollywood when he was cast to be in the film, Road Trip. The film was okay, but it made a shit load of money, and while being narrated によって Tom Green, 狐, フォックス decided to give Tom Green a movie. A full movie that he could make, on his own, with no limitations other than to keep it under NC-17. So, yes, for his roles in テレビ and one movie role ever, Tom Green was 与えられた fourteen million dollars and total control over his movie. Fuck, man, Stanley Kubrick and Martin Socrses wish they could get that lucky on their first try. So, with $14 mil in his pocket and his hopes high, Tom set out to make the movie he always wanted to make. And how was it?!

Part 2: freddy got fingered



… huh. Well I mean… It’s not the worst comedy I’ve ever seen. I’d rather be shocked and offended then bored out of my skull. Okay, so, let’s talk about it. Freddy Got Fingered is a comedy film released in 2001. Yeah, もっと見る tragedy that year. Hoo boy. It follows our hero, Gordy, a 28 年 old dead beat who dreams of being an animator but lives with his parents and deals with his disappointed father, played によって the late Rip Torn in one of his funniest roles. I never thought I would laugh so much at an abusive parent. The film is an 時 and twenty seven minutes. And throughout this film, there is barely anything that happens plot wise. There are many scenes, like Tom Green swinging a salami around in peoples faces like his dick, jerking off a horse, wearing the skin of a dead deer and playing with it, licking the exposed broken bone of his friend, biting into a baby’s imbilecal cord and then swinging it around akin to fucking “So long, Gay Bowser”, and just sheer stupidity like scenes such as Daddy Would あなた Like Some Sausage and The Backwards Man. And it isn’t until 50 分 exactly, yes, fifty 分 of this 時 and twenty seven 分 long movie, just above thirty 分 left of the film, we get to the actual plot of the film, the thing the movie is named after, where Freddy, tired of his fathers constant insults and abuse, accuses his father in therapy for fingering his 25-year-old younger brother, Freddy, and gets him taken away. This plot goes nowhere and is just made for もっと見る shock value. The film is full of so many scenes like this from beginning and ending, even other such horrid things, like a hospital called The Institute for Sexually Molested Children where they run around without supervision and watch Texas Chainsaw Massacre, and a running joke of this kid, the best actor in the movie, getting assaulted horribly, including getting a bottle smashed on his head, getting his teeth knocked out, and getting grinded up in an airplane propeller, but he says he’s okay, so it’s cool. This film is just shock and violence and sickening imagery and stupidity one after another. And I gotta be honest… I can’t believe I’m going to say this… But I kind of… enjoy it. Okay, here me out, please. Is Freddy Got Fingered a good movie? Fuck no. While the comedy fits my sick sense of humor, the film has many other issues. Plot lines that go nowhere and just don’t matter, and just exist to be pointless, and that doesn’t include the weird editing with the camera shots, the inconsistent lighting, the poor 芝居 from some characters, and just the constant revolting imagery. But there’s just something about it. Like the film is so bad, yet it feels so lovingly crafted to be bad. Like the scenes are so shocking, and so horrid, that I find myself laughing with them. It also helps that I showed my grandma this movie. YES! Really! My poor 75 年 old grandma was born witness to this fucking travesty. And the thing is, we were hyperventilating with laughter. We were disgusted, we were uncomfortable, we both were probably experiencing a hate crime… But we were invested. There came a point where the madness just took us over and we were laughing with Freddy Got Fingered. Much like the Joker finding that life was actually a comedy, it felt like that. Aside from the part where we scream about society.



So yeah, Freddy Got Fingered is not a good movie. But it is an entertaining movie. How many 映画 are considered so bad, they’re good, または ones that eventually become beloved classics? Like people nowadays forget that The Shining was a hated film at the time. People thought that the idea of a father killing their family was unsettling and cruel, which… no shit? It’s a horror film. You’re supposed to be uncomfortable. And yes, I did use The Shining to prove my point about Freddy Got Fingered. This is how far I’ve sunk. But think about it. The Room, Samurai Cop, Plan 9. Hell, Kung Pow: Enter the Fist is regarded as a trash tier movie, and yet so many people reference it all the time. Johnny Mnemonic is considered a garbage film, yet it’s one of the most influential cyberpunk films around. Also has Keanu Reeves, pre-Johnny Silverhand era. What I’m saying is, あなた can be a bad film, but あなた can still be entertaining. And if あなた entertain, あなた did your job and あなた did it… right? Well あなた did it. Being bad but entertaining is fine. Otherwise, if you're bad and you're boring, then あなた have no point of existing, and yes, I mean you, Captain Marvel. And boy did this film fail. Not just critically, but at the box office. $14 million spent and $14.3 million gained. Yeah, that may not sound so bad, but that just makes it a waste of everyone's time. For a film to be a success, it needs to make back double what it spent. Otherwise, what the fuck was the point? And yeah, not only that, but everyone hated being in this film, pretty much, and no one brings up being in this film. Everyone… except Tom Green

Part 3: The Absolute Mad Lad

Tom Green was all about this film, crazy about it. Obviously, he was big into just doing his usual brand of humor, harassing his parents, fictional parents, but still. Putting ランダム things in his mouth, including animals, be it alive または dead. And just being a menace to people. Hell, when あなた make local screwball, Harland Williams, the straight man that 質問 the madness of another character… Well, shit, I don’t know if that’s an act of miscasting または if that was just to prove the point that your character is もっと見る insane than the man with a high pitched girl scream. But Tom Green made the film he wanted to make. And what he wanted to make was a total bastardization of the medium as a whole, something that would offend everyone, make everyone disgusted, and just be called trash. All paid for によって a giant billion dollar conglomerate and just watch as he burned all their money for fun. When Tom Green won his Razzie at the 2001 Golden ラズベリー Awards, he came with pride, in a white Cadillac, a suit, and even brought his own red carpet. This man won nine Razzies and he was fucking egstatic. It could have won Worst Film of the Decade, but Battlefield Earth was just too shitty. He even advertises the bad reviews in the DVD pamphlet. Here, this is my physical copy of Freddy Got Fingered



And here is the pamphlet’s good review



And here’s the rest



So yeah, this man takes pride in his failure. He wanted to make the worst film ever and he succeeded. A film so hated and disgusted. But… the thing is… It kinda isn’t

Part 4: Wait, there’s もっと見る of this bullshit?!

So yeah, as it turns out, Freddy Got Fingered may have been a pioneer for the film genre of dumb humor, as it is now considered on it’s official Wikipedia page a surrealist comedy film. The insane, almost maddening humor of Freddy Got Fingered, and how everyone is so casual to this man child’s escapades aside from his father who is falling into もっと見る and もっと見る madness as his son screws up his life もっと見る and もっと見る all feels like a nightmare. Especially the hospital scene where Freddy swings a baby around as these women chant in some sort of hymn as blood splatters the wall. And yet, why do I find the madness funny. Well, I think it has to do with me, personally. Because I grew up with a lot of Adult Swim shows as a kid. I watched all the classics growing up. Aqua Teen Hunger Force, Tim and Eric Awesome Show, Superjail, Metalocalypse, Moral Orel, and so many more. I even check out some of their もっと見る 最近 and absurd stuff like The Shivering Truth and the ever topical Eric Andre Show. All that, mixed with the insane humor of the internet just adds to that. What I’m trying to say is that I like humor that is very abstract and absurdist. That’s the nice way of saying my humor is fucking retarded. This shit, right here?



Yeah, this is comedy ゴールド to me. Basically, what I’m saying is that the comedy of Freddy Got Fingered holds up a lot. Now, am I gonna to sit here and say that Freddy Got Fingered is a better comedy than 映画 like Clerks または Blues Brothers または Fargo? Uh, fucking no. I mean, fuck, it’s barely funnier than Nacho Libre (BTW, Nacho Libre is good, don’t @ me, queermongers). But Freddy Got Fingered was ahead of the humor of the insanity and just sheer shock of it all. Maybe not on par with the quality of Eric Andre または Aqua Teen Hunger Force, and really, the best absurdist comedy film ever was Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas, that’s just a hard fact, but Freddy Got Fingered was very much a start of this humor. And hey, remember that pointlessness that was brought up, but also nihilistic? Well, really, isn’t this film nihilistic? Like Freddy Got Fingered is a gross out comedy about a grown man watching 動物 have sex and lets a parapallegic girl suck him off. But what the film is actually about is a crude and socially retarded grown man who wants to achieve something in his life, but is beaten down によって his emotionally and verbally abusive father, on 上, ページのトップへ of hating the disabled and being a sexist pig. So he accuses his dad of being a child molester just to get back at him, ruining his fathers life and coming out on 上, ページのトップへ only to piss all his fortune away in some absurd attempt to impress his father, with scenes of disabilities, violence, including that on children, and just sheer lack of care from the world around them. Is… is Freddy Got Fingered smarter than it actually is??? Ha ha ha! Oh, god, fuck no, this film is a fucking ダンプスター, ゴミ箱, 収集 fire. But it is a ダンプスター, ゴミ箱, 収集 火災, 火 I want to watch burn, examine the ashes, and try to find the value in it. And that brings me to my last point.

Part 5: For fucks sake, just like what あなた want to like



Seriously, why is it that we have reached a point where we all have to agree on something just someone called it good または bad. Look, I don’t care who あなた are. I don’t care what あなた like. If あなた like something, and genuinely 愛 it with a passion, then sick. But for god's sake, don’t go saying something is bad because someone on the internet または a critic 発言しました it was trash, because that just keeps あなた from forming your own opinions. If あなた like Highschool of the Dead for the social commentary and how the tits and asses may actually be a commentary on teenage hormones, good for you. If あなた think YIIK: A Postmodern RPG is a game that is worth talking about because of the insane デザイン and story choices and are important for those reasons while having some genuine good ideas, good. And if あなた watch a fucking psychotic film によって a mad man who attacks his parents and think, “Hey, this movie is pretty funny”, then good. I would rather あなた 愛 something that is terrible and mean it, rather than agree with the general populace that it is terrible without seeing it. And vice versa too. Don’t just read this 記事 and say, “Ya know, maybe Freddy Got Fingered is good.” No! あなた won’t know what あなた like または don’t like if あなた don’t experience it for yourself. If あなた are mildly curious about this movie, then go check it out. If not, that’s fine. But don’t hate it または like it because someone 発言しました so. The reviews of people online are not gospel. This isn’t an Anton Ego from レミーのおいしいレストラン where my word on Freddy Got Fingered is my final word, THE final word. Because no. あなた really think I have intelligence and influence to change minds? I just spent six hours on this, an 時 and a half watching the movie a 秒 time, two hours doing research on the movie, Tom Green, and some stupid art movement that no one knows nor cares about except art nerds and me, and the remaining spent typing this shit out while listening to fucking ska 音楽 and drinking 尻, お尻 tasting energy drinks. I’m a faggot. But at least my opinion is my own. Make your own opinion. And don’t be ashamed to admit it. I’m not gonna call Freddy Got Fingered a guilty pleasure because that devalues the opinions of others, I think. I’m not gonna say, “So I like Freddy Got Fingered. Pretty cringey, am I right, fam?”. No. Fuck that. Fuck you! I like Freddy Got Fingered. Finger my boyhole if あなた don’t like it. (Just kidding, I 愛 you. Please don’t divorce me).
So yeah, that about wraps it up. In conclusion, Freddy Got Fingered is trash. But I am a filthy raccoon man and I crave trash. And I leave あなた with this. Tom Green had tried to get Gene Wilder, of Young Frankenstein and original Willy Wonka fame, to be his dad, but he refused as he thought the movie was offensive. Man, we could have had Willy Wonka call Tom Green a retard and a faggot, but… I guess in another lifetime. See あなた later, masturbators.
Original Video: link

Transcript:
Stan Smith: Okay, class, It is time to hand back your レポート cards. I will pass them out now.
Sugar: Oh, lord, please let me have a good レポート card. (Sugar sees her レポート card and notices the bad grades and remarks, especially with Sugar being sent to a Mental People's School.) No! (x7) Waaaaaaaaaaaa!
Ella: Yay! I got a 4.0 GPA and Straight A's! (Ella leaves her desk) Mr. Smith, may I use the bathroom?
Stan: Sure. Also, we are looking for a time and 日付 for your Student of the 年 award ceremony.
Ella: Okay, thank you!
Sugar: I can't believe I got a 0.0 on my report...
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posted by jlhfan624
Because why not, right?

1. My お気に入り foods are dill pickles and potatoes.
2. I do not like coffee. または tea.
3. I can't think of a joint in my body I don't crack on a daily basis.
4. I 愛 愛 愛 愛 retro advertising, mostly from 80s and down. It makes me feel very nostalgic.
5. I have been dying my hair since I was a young teenager.
6. My お気に入り Colors(色) are brown, purple and gray.
7. I consider myself a contrarian.

8. I lived in England for 6 months when I was 4 years old.
9. I suffer from all manner of link.
10. My humor is so dry and sharp, my own parents can't tell when I'm joking or...
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posted by Seanthehedgehog
Song: link

Narrator: Sugar. Spice, and everything nice. These were the ingredients chosen to create the perfect little girls, but Professor Utonium accidentally added an extra ingredient to the concoction. Chemical X!
Professor: *Gets moved backwards によって an explosion, but smiles when he sees what he created*
Narrator: Thus the Powerpuff Girls were born! Using their ultra super powers, Blossom, Bubbles, and Buttercup have dedicated their lives to fighting crime, and the forces of evil.
Blossom: *Flies through the sky*
Bubbles: *Flying to the right of Blossom*
Buttercup: *Flying to the left of...
continue reading...
posted by Seanthehedgehog
Song: link

Narrator: Sugar. Spice, and everything nice. These were the ingredients chosen to create the perfect little girls, but Professor Utonium accidentally added an extra ingredient to the concoction. Chemical X!
Professor: *Gets moved backwards によって an explosion, but smiles when he sees what he created*
Narrator: Thus the Powerpuff Girls were born! Using their ultra super powers, Blossom, Bubbles, and Buttercup have dedicated their lives to fighting crime, and the forces of evil.
Blossom: *Flies through the sky*
Bubbles: *Flying to the right of Blossom*
Buttercup: *Flying to the left of...
continue reading...
What is good life? What is happiness? What is success? What is pleasure? How should I treat other people? How should I cope with unfortunate events? How can I get rid off unnecessary worry? How should I handle liberty?


1- Be a Responsible Human Being. Approach yourself with honesty and thoroughness; maintain a kind of spiritual hygiene; stop the blame-shifting for your errors and shortcomings.

2-Worry only about the things that are in your control, the things that can be influenced and changed によって your actions, not about the things that are beyond your capacity to direct または alter.

3-Experience...
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posted by Seanthehedgehog
Song: link

Narrator: Sugar. Spice, and everything nice. These were the ingredients chosen to create the perfect little girls, but Professor Utonium accidentally added an extra ingredient to the concoction. Chemical X!
Professor: *Gets moved backwards によって an explosion, but smiles when he sees what he created*
Narrator: Thus the Powerpuff Girls were born! Using their ultra super powers, Blossom, Bubbles, and Buttercup have dedicated their lives to fighting crime, and the forces of evil.
Blossom: *Flies through the sky*
Bubbles: *Flying to the right of Blossom*
Buttercup: *Flying to the left of...
continue reading...
posted by BJsRealm
This world definitely need a single global currency.I hope BTC would become a global currency in the near future.So far,BTC is just a cryptocurrency used only on .onion sites yet someday it just might become the new official global/UN electronic currency.
posted by Seanthehedgehog
Song: link

Narrator: Sugar. Spice, and everything nice. These were the ingredients chosen to create the perfect little girls, but Professor Utonium accidentally added an extra ingredient to the concoction. Chemical X!
Professor: *Gets moved backwards によって an explosion, but smiles when he sees what he created*
Narrator: Thus the Powerpuff Girls were born! Using their ultra super powers, Blossom, Bubbles, and Buttercup have dedicated their lives to fighting crime, and the forces of evil.
Blossom: *Flies through the sky*
Bubbles: *Flying to the right of Blossom*
Buttercup: *Flying to the left of...
continue reading...
#5: BRIAN JEREMY:
He has a pretty childish way of agreeing on everything Billy says and does, and once imitated Johnny in a pretty immature way. He's willing to lie, キッス ass, and stab people in the back if it means saving his own skin. And even if あなた spare him, he later tries to kill あなた anyway..


#4: JASON MICHAELS:
Yes Jason, keep fucking a Russian Mobster's daughter, and stealing man's expensive vodka. Clearly nothing bad is gonna come from that. Especially when your fully aware of how angry it's making him..


#3: ASHLEY BUTLER:
Her addiction means she'll sleep with anyone to get the 次 fix,...
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posted by Seanthehedgehog

An Imperial landing craft was leaving Coruscant. However, no Imperials were inside. It was only two men from the Republic.

Republic Pilot: *Looking at the clear sky. No other ships are seen as they are out of Coruscant*
Colonel Turner: *Walks up, and sits 次 to the pilot* Thirty five minutes. Can we make it?
Republic Pilot: We can make it. Will your フレンズ make it?
Colonel Turner: Let's hope so.

Song: link

John made it back to the shed with Morris, Mary, and Cartwright where Heidi was waiting in the speeder bus.

Heidi: *Puts up a jammer, and turns it on*
John: *Starts the speeder bus,...
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posted by TheLefteris24
 Praise Kek!
Praise Kek!
Heed those words Mortals and set yourselves free!

There is no peace, there is PEPE
There is no fear, there is Shadilay(Peace be upon him).
There is no death, there is God Emperor.
There is no weakness, there is the MEMES.

I am the ハート, 心 of darkness.
I know no fear.
But rather I instil it in my enemies.
I am the destroyer of worlds.
I know the power of the MEMES.
I am the 火災, 火 of hate.

All the universe bows before kek.
I pledge myself to kek.
For I have found true life In the death of SocJus.

Peace is a lie, there is only Kek.
Through passion, I gain salt.
Through Shadilay(Peace be upon him), I gain power.
Through power, I gain Lulz.
Through victory, my chains are broken.
The MEMES shall set me free.

Preached によって the Enlightened Prophet known as ''The Turbo Syncretist''. The truth has been spoken! Know
T
h
e

C
o
d
e

o
f

K
e
K

Praise Kek !!!!
 KEK WILLS IT!
KEK WILLS IT!
It all started back in November of 2013 - I finally received a new cellphone, a Nokia Lumina 520, and along with it, I finally got my own Eメール account and password.
While it was nice having those, I didn't really use them, not even to make a フェイスブック account. However, in クリスマス of that year, while watching some YouTube videos, it suddenly dawned on me: I could use the Eメール and パスワード to create my own Google account and コメント on YouTube videos. I liked 読書 other people's コメント (When they were not rude.) and I wanted to do it, myself.
After creating my Google account, I immediately...
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posted by twinklestar11
My お気に入り singer/raper is Bars and Melody. They began singing/rapping July 2014. At that time I had no idea who they were till 2016. People don't like them, but i dont know why. Maybe cuz those people dont like rapping または listening to young kid bands. They rapper is Leondre who started rapping when he was 13. People say it was 14, but the Bars and Melody song was relased in July and Leondre's birthday is in October so he was accully 13 when he started. The singer is Charlie. Charlie was 歌う when he was 15. His birthday is also in October. They are no longer 13 and 15. Leondre is now 16...
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 Episode 3 has arrived!
Episode 3 has arrived!
Welcome back again mates! In case あなた missed the first episode, here's a quick recap of what this 記事 series is all about.

In the first episode, the debut of this show, I thought up five crazy and ランダム scenarios that I thought would make for entertainingly cringy headlines for Newspapers and/or YouTube videos, and asked あなた all for ideas in the コメント section below! That's also how this 表示する has been running since Episode 2, so if あなた like this series, then don't forget to ファン and leave a コメント below on what あなた guys and gals want me to create in the 次 episode!

And with that being...
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Hi YouTube fans. There are several interesting shows on YouTube and several of aren't really well known. The following 5 channels are made によって very nice and talented people. I highly recommend checking out these channels.

5. Doodletones

Doodletones is a member of the Commentary Community. She's a very talented commentator who knows how to be both informative and entertaining. She makes 動画 frequently so あなた don't have to worry about running out of 動画 to watch.

4. FutureGohanSSJ2

FutureGohanSSJ2 is a cartoon lover. He has plenty of 動画 where he talks about cartoon relater merchandise...
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Picture this. You're a newspaper boy in the 1880's and your headlines just don't seem to be selling as well as they used to. Therefore, your company decides to change things up and start lying just a LITTLE bit.

...Well, at least of your definition of lying a LITTLE bit is completely changing the タイトル of your papers to something amusing and spreading misinformation just to rake in もっと見る cash from the public. And mine is!

So today, people. We're going to go dive headfirst into the world of clickbait. But first and foremost, the most important 質問 of them all.

What exactly IS clickbait?

Basically...
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How do I become sarcastic?
"I'm the クイーン of sarcasm, あなた don't just suddenly become sarcastic, it takes practice"


My house is on fire, what do I do?
"You get off the fuckin computer and go outside!"


My brother hasn't had his period:
"Yeah. It takes longer for boys"


What's an appropriate site for a 13 年 old girl?
"Try Porn-Hub"


Can あなた get pregnant from watching porn?
"Only on wednesdays"


Every time I drink alcohol I feel sad.
"Your not drinking ENOUGH of of it!"


I was having sex with my sister and got a cramp in my leg.
"YOU HAD SEX WITH YOUR SISTER!?"


Why are 赤ちゃん ugly at first?
"How about you...
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added by Mollymolata
added by shaneoohmac13
So I wrote this because I have no life and I would like to have one. And if you're like me, welcome. While I teach あなた what to do in your spare time (or all the time, if you, like me, have no life), I'll be teaching myself, too. So really, I'm killing two birds with one stone here. Yay.

TEN THINGS TO DO IF あなた HAVE NO LIFE

1. Get a life

It's exactly what it means.

2. Get another life

This doesn't make sense but if あなた have no life, あなた know it does.

3. Eat Ben and Jerry's

Because, why not?

4. Don't do your homework

Because if あなた do it, you'll have a life. And if あなた have a life, then あなた wouldn't...
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