Here are my 一覧 of corny jokes. Now i'm just gonna let あなた know now i got alot of these from the YouTube channel, vlogbrothers. So check them out too. Prepare to laugh.
(Make sure your not drinking anything または eating anything あなた might spit it または something.)

#1 How did the hipster burn his tongue?
He drank coffee before it was cool.

#2 Why are celsius and farenheit friends?
Because they're fair-in-height. (I came up with that one :)

#3 Why was the ほうき late to work?
It overswept!

#4 Why do seagulls fly over the sea?
Because if they flew over the ベイ, 湾 they'd be bagels.

#5 What's Michelle Obama's お気に入り vegetable?
Barackoli (broccoli)

#6 Why does the キノコ have so many friends?
Because he's a fungi! (Fun guy)

#7 What do あなた call a fake noodle?
An impasta! (Imposter)

#8 How often do i make chemistry jokes?
Periodically.

#9 What do あなた call a pencil without lead?
Pointless!

#10 How do あなた make an octopus giggle ten times?
あなた give him ten-tickles (tenticles)

#11 How do あなた make lady gaga cry?
Poker face!

#12 What did Beethoven become when he died?
A decomposer!

#13 What's a chicken's お気に入り composer?
Bach!

#14 What did one eye say to the other eye?
"Between あなた and me man, something smells." (Your nose)

#15 What did the stamp say to the envelope?
"Stick with me man, we'll go places."

#16 What did the hat say to the hatrack?
"Stay here, I'll go on a-head."

#17 Why can't あなた hear a pteradactyl use the bathroom?
Because the "p" is silent (the letter p in the name is silent)

#18 Why did the little boy eat his homework?
The teacher 発言しました it was a piece of cake.

#19 Why did the トマト blush?
It saw the サラダ dressing.

#20 What did the dog say when he sat on sandpaper?
"Ruff!" (Rough)

#21 Why did the man send his phone to school?
He wanted a smartphone (i came up with that one too :)

#22 How do crazy people go through a forest?
They take the psycho path.

#23 How do あなた know if it's raining ネコ and dogs?
あなた step in a poodle (puddle)

#24 How do あなた know if a clock is wise?
It goes clockwise (i thought of that)

#25 How do あなた get ピカチュウ on a bus?
あなた ポケモン (pok 'em on)

#26 Why can't あなた dress with ピカチュウ in the room?
He'll ピカチュウ (peek at you)

#27 What do あなた call cheese that isn't yours?
Nacho cheese (so old right?)

#28 How do get holy water?
あなた boil the hell out of it!

#29 What starts with "E" ends with "E" but only has one letter in it?
An envelope, duh xD

#30 Why didn't the skeleton クロス the road?
He didn't have the guts to.

#31 What did the ghost say to scare the bees?
"BOOOOBEEES!" XD (please don't yell that if your parents are home)

#32 What does an angry pepper do?
It gets jalepeño face! (All up in yo face)

#33 What do あなた call an alligator in a vest?
An in- vest-igator investigator

#34 What's ピンク and fluffy?
ピンク fluff
#34.5 what's blue and fluffy? (Think about it)
ピンク fluff holding it's breath.

#35 What happens when あなた drink 7 coca colas?
あなた burp 7up

#36 Why can't your nose ever be 12 inches long?
Because then it'd be a foot.

#37 why does snoop dog carry an umbrella?
Fo' drizzle!

#38 Why was the police man in bed?
He was undercover.

#39 what did one light bulb say to another light bulb?
"Watts up?" (You know li,e the watts that are in a light bulb?)

#40 what did the 魚 say when he hit a concrete wall?
"Dam!"
LAST ONE!

#41 Why can't あなた trust lions?
They be lion to you! (Lying)

Alright so those are my corny jokes. Hope あなた liked them. Make sure あなた check out vlogbrothers they're really cool. Ciao! And rememeber...