Ways To Annoy Bathroom Friends
1.Stick your palm open under the stall ウォール and ask your neighbor, ''May I borrow a highlighter?''
2. ''Uh-oh, I knew I shouldn't put my lips on that.''
3. Cheer and clap loudly every time somebody breaks the silence with a bodily function noise.
4. ''Hmmm, I've never seen that color before.''
5. ''Damn, this water is cold.''
6. Grunt and strain real loud for 30 秒 and then drop a cantaloupe into the toilet bowl from a high place and sigh relaxingly.
7. ''Now how did that get there?''
8. ''Hummus. Reminds me of hummus.''
9. Fill up a large flask with Mountain Dew. Squirt it erratically under the stall walls of your neighbors while yelling,''Whoa! Easy boy!!''
10. '' Interesting....more sinkers than floaters''
11. Using a small squeeze tube, spread 落花生, ピーナッツ バター on a wad of toilet paper and drop under the stall ウォール of your neighbor. Then say,''Whoops,could あなた kick that back over here, please?"
12. ''C'mon Mr. Happy! Don't fall asleep on me!!"
13. ''Boy, that sure looks like a maggot''
14. ''Damn, I knew that drain hole was a little too small. Now what am I gonna do?''
15. Play a well-known drum cadence over and over again on your butt cheeks.
16. Before あなた unroll toilet paper, conspicuously lay down your ''Cross-Dressers Anonymous'' newsletter on the floor visible to the adjacent stall.
17. Lower a small mirror underneath the stall ウォール and adjust it so あなた can see your neighbor and say, ''Peek-a-boo!''
18. Drop a D-cup bra on the floor under the stall ウォール and sing ''Born Free.''
_________________
How To Maintain A Healthy Level Of Insanity
1. At lunch time, sit in your parked car with sun glasses on and point a hair dryer at passing cars. See if they slow down.
2. On all your cheque stubs,write 'For Marijuana'.
3. Skip down the 通り, ストリート rather than walk and see how many looks あなた get.
4. Order a Diet Water whenever あなた go out toeat, with a serious face.
5. Sing along at the Opera.
6. When the money comes out of the ATM, scream 'I Won! I Won!'
7. When leaving the Zoo, start running towards the car park, yelling 'Run For Your Lives! They're Loose!'
8. Tell your children overdinner, 'Due to the economy, we are going to have to let one of あなた go.'
And The Final Way To Keep A Healthy Level Of Insanity
9. PICK UP A BOX OF CONDOMS AT THE PHARMACY, GO TO THE COUNTER AND ASK WHERE THE FITTING ROOM IS.
____________________
Things to do on an Elevator
1) CRACK open your ブリーフケース または handbag, peer Inside and ask “Got enough air in there?”
2) STAND silent and motionless in the corner facing the ウォール without getting off.
3) WHEN arriving at your floor, grunt and strain to yank the doors open, then act as if you’re embarrassed when they open themselves.
4) GREET everyone with a warm handshake and ask him または her to call あなた Admiral.
5) MEOW occasionally.
6) STARE At another passenger for a while. Then announce in horror: “You’re one of THEM” - and back away slowly
7) SAY -DING at each floor.
8) SAY “I wonder what all these do?” And push all the red buttons.
9) MAKE explosion noises when anyone presses a button.
10) STARE, grinning at another passenger for a while, then announce: “I have new socks on.”
11) WHEN the elevator is silent, look around and ask: “Is that your beeper?”
12) TRY to make personal calls on the emergency phone.
13) DRAW a little square on the floor with chalk and announce to the other passengers: “This is my personal space.”
14) WHEN there’s only one other person in the elevator, tap them on the shoulder, then pretend it wasn’t you.
15) PUSH the buttons and pretend they give あなた a shock. Smile, and go back for more.
16) ASK if あなた can pushthe button for other people but push the wrong ones.
17) HOLD the doors open and say you’re waiting for your friend. After a while,let the doors close and say“Hi Greg, How’s your 日 been?”
18) DROP a pen and wait until someone reaches to help pick it up, then scream: “That’s mine!”
19) BRING a camera and take pictures of everyone in the lift.
20) PRETEND you’re a flight attendant and review emergency procedures and exits with the Passengers.
21) SWAT at flies that don’t exist.
22) CALL out “Group hug” then enforce it.
1.Stick your palm open under the stall ウォール and ask your neighbor, ''May I borrow a highlighter?''
2. ''Uh-oh, I knew I shouldn't put my lips on that.''
3. Cheer and clap loudly every time somebody breaks the silence with a bodily function noise.
4. ''Hmmm, I've never seen that color before.''
5. ''Damn, this water is cold.''
6. Grunt and strain real loud for 30 秒 and then drop a cantaloupe into the toilet bowl from a high place and sigh relaxingly.
7. ''Now how did that get there?''
8. ''Hummus. Reminds me of hummus.''
9. Fill up a large flask with Mountain Dew. Squirt it erratically under the stall walls of your neighbors while yelling,''Whoa! Easy boy!!''
10. '' Interesting....more sinkers than floaters''
11. Using a small squeeze tube, spread 落花生, ピーナッツ バター on a wad of toilet paper and drop under the stall ウォール of your neighbor. Then say,''Whoops,could あなた kick that back over here, please?"
12. ''C'mon Mr. Happy! Don't fall asleep on me!!"
13. ''Boy, that sure looks like a maggot''
14. ''Damn, I knew that drain hole was a little too small. Now what am I gonna do?''
15. Play a well-known drum cadence over and over again on your butt cheeks.
16. Before あなた unroll toilet paper, conspicuously lay down your ''Cross-Dressers Anonymous'' newsletter on the floor visible to the adjacent stall.
17. Lower a small mirror underneath the stall ウォール and adjust it so あなた can see your neighbor and say, ''Peek-a-boo!''
18. Drop a D-cup bra on the floor under the stall ウォール and sing ''Born Free.''
_________________
How To Maintain A Healthy Level Of Insanity
1. At lunch time, sit in your parked car with sun glasses on and point a hair dryer at passing cars. See if they slow down.
2. On all your cheque stubs,write 'For Marijuana'.
3. Skip down the 通り, ストリート rather than walk and see how many looks あなた get.
4. Order a Diet Water whenever あなた go out toeat, with a serious face.
5. Sing along at the Opera.
6. When the money comes out of the ATM, scream 'I Won! I Won!'
7. When leaving the Zoo, start running towards the car park, yelling 'Run For Your Lives! They're Loose!'
8. Tell your children overdinner, 'Due to the economy, we are going to have to let one of あなた go.'
And The Final Way To Keep A Healthy Level Of Insanity
9. PICK UP A BOX OF CONDOMS AT THE PHARMACY, GO TO THE COUNTER AND ASK WHERE THE FITTING ROOM IS.
____________________
Things to do on an Elevator
1) CRACK open your ブリーフケース または handbag, peer Inside and ask “Got enough air in there?”
2) STAND silent and motionless in the corner facing the ウォール without getting off.
3) WHEN arriving at your floor, grunt and strain to yank the doors open, then act as if you’re embarrassed when they open themselves.
4) GREET everyone with a warm handshake and ask him または her to call あなた Admiral.
5) MEOW occasionally.
6) STARE At another passenger for a while. Then announce in horror: “You’re one of THEM” - and back away slowly
7) SAY -DING at each floor.
8) SAY “I wonder what all these do?” And push all the red buttons.
9) MAKE explosion noises when anyone presses a button.
10) STARE, grinning at another passenger for a while, then announce: “I have new socks on.”
11) WHEN the elevator is silent, look around and ask: “Is that your beeper?”
12) TRY to make personal calls on the emergency phone.
13) DRAW a little square on the floor with chalk and announce to the other passengers: “This is my personal space.”
14) WHEN there’s only one other person in the elevator, tap them on the shoulder, then pretend it wasn’t you.
15) PUSH the buttons and pretend they give あなた a shock. Smile, and go back for more.
16) ASK if あなた can pushthe button for other people but push the wrong ones.
17) HOLD the doors open and say you’re waiting for your friend. After a while,let the doors close and say“Hi Greg, How’s your 日 been?”
18) DROP a pen and wait until someone reaches to help pick it up, then scream: “That’s mine!”
19) BRING a camera and take pictures of everyone in the lift.
20) PRETEND you’re a flight attendant and review emergency procedures and exits with the Passengers.
21) SWAT at flies that don’t exist.
22) CALL out “Group hug” then enforce it.
