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posted by Bluepenguin
- Knock Knock Jokes -

Private is laying in his bunk like a sack of potatoes, bored and lazily watching the clock.
Private: 1:00 P.M.... still two もっと見る hours until they 表示する the Lunacorns...
Skipper: Private! For one 日 can あなた please not watch those ridiculous moonhorns with their hippie caring powers?!
Private: Aww! But why, Skippa?
Skipper angrily gazes at Private.
Skipper: Private...
Private: Ok, ok! (Sigh)....... ooh! I have an idea! Knock, knock!
Skipper: Who's there?
Private: Vampire!
Skipper: Vampire who?
Private: (Giggle) Vampire State Building! Ahahahaha!
Skipper looks at Private with an "I'm not amused" face and goes to the 表, テーブル where he has his maps and training plans that he has been working on. Kowalski opens the door of his lab, carrying his clipboard and scribbling down data from his latest experiment.
Private: Oh, hello Kowalski! Knock knock!
Kowalski: Private, あなた are not even near a wooden door, how can あなた knock without hitting a surface?
Private: Oh come on Kowalski! Have some fun for once!
Kowalski: (Sighs and speaks in a bored tone) Who's there?
Private: B-4!
Kowalski: B-4 who?
Private: Open this door B-4 I freeze out here! Ahahaha!
Private begins to roll on the floor laughing. As Rico enters through the hatch, he glances questioningly at Private, and goes back outside, nodding his head and mumbling "Tisk, tisk tisk" followed によって some brief grunts.
Skipper: I think that's enough jokes for today. Go watch your treasured moonhorn show.
Private: Oh thank あなた Skipper! I guess being annoying does get あなた everything!
added by PenguinStyle
added by hanz1192
Source: King Julien For A 日
added by hanz1192
Source: ラット Fink
added by Bluepenguin
Source: Right Hand Man
added by Bluepenguin
Source: The ロスト Treasure of the Golden リス
added by Bluepenguin
Source: Truth Ache
added by eugb
Source: Hello, Dollface
added by Bluepenguin
Source: Concrete Jungle Survival
added by Lzk94pzpom
Source: there trick または treating!
posted by Metallica1147
Author’s Note: I don’t care if あなた don’t like the story. Haters gonna hate is what I say. All I ask is that あなた don’t flame me for my grammar. I try my best to 編集 as much as I can but I can’t seem to fix all the grammar errors. But I do try. Enjoy the story! :)

                 Fallout
     Chapter 1: Early Years

War... War never changes. Since the dawn of mankind, when our ancestors first discovered the killing power of rock and bone, blood has been spilled in the name of everything:...
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Request によって link. Hope あなた enjoy. ;D

*****************************************************************

Doris's New Beau: Take 1

[KOWALSKI and PARKER are shown walking down a dock]

Kowalski: "She...needs me?"

Parker: "Her very words. 発言しました you're the smartest guy she's ever met."

Kowalski: *smiles huge* "Ah, always knew Doris would come to her senses someday. It's the casual-" *steps on end of board and the other end smacks him in the face* "Daie!" *falls over*

Director: *sighs* "Can someone please fix that?"

GuyOffSet: "On it!"

Director: "Kowalski, are あなた alright?"

Kowalski: *gets to feet and rubs head*...
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Private woke up that morning feeling sluggish. His stomach was moaning like an iriated beast.
S: "Good morning, Private!"
P: "Good morning, Skippah."
S: "You hungry?"
P: "Yes, extremely, actually."
S: "Good! Cause we're going fishing!"
P: "Wait, did あなた say we are going fishing?"
S: "You heard me, we are going fishing."
P: "Yay!"
S: "You have to learn sometime. Besides, you've earned it!"

The two 鳩 into the icy water. Little did they know their scent was caught によって two blood-thristy predators. Skipper led Private cautiously towards a colossal school of fish. Skipper motioned to Private to open his...
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Skipper woke up late that morning. He waddled to the sleeping Private. A smile came across his face as he stroked Private's head with his gentle flipper. Private opened his eyes sluggishly.
P: "Good morning, Skippah."
S: "Good morning, did あなた sleep well last night?"
P: "Yes, I did. Did you?"
S: "Yeah, あなた want to see the colony today?"
P: "Okay!"
S: "I'm going to get breakfast. Remember all the rules."
P: "Can I come?"
S: "No, not yet. I don't think you're ready now."
P: "I've fished in the pond at ホーム before."
S: "Yes, but there aren't those carnivorious beast there."
P: "I can handle it. Believe me....
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HQ:
Private: ACHOO! *sniffle*

Private sits tiredly on the table, as Kowalski probes around Private with thermometers, stethoscopes, and a tape measure.

Kowalski: According to my calculations, it seems that Private has become sick with some sort of virus.
Private: Ah.. Ah.. ACHOO!
Kowalski: Eh, and a very sickly one, I might add.
Rico: Eww.
Skipper: Well, nothing a little sleep and some お茶, 紅茶 can't cure!
Private: But Skipper, I feel like my head weighs a thousand tons! Don't あなた have any-
Skipper: Wait, あなた 発言しました your head feels heavy? Do あなた happen to be sneezing uncontrollably and feeling faint every...
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posted by krazy4kowalski
Sorry it took me so long to update! This was a difficult chapter to write, but I’m pleased with the final product. I hope あなた enjoy it and, yes, not all the characters are going to survive this. Just wanted to make that clear.

Hopeless Situations

“Um, excuse me, Dr. Blowhole?” Private said, “I-I’m still stuck here!”
“Oh, I know, Private,” he responded, “I know.”
“Hey, let the private go, Blowhole!” Skipper ordered.
The イルカ bowed mockingly, “Your wish is my command, Skipper!” At that moment, the floor began to tremble. The penguins hit the floor, and Kowalski...
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New Transfer
It was early in the morning when I was getting the team ready for today's schedule. They were all there except for Kowalski. I had 与えられた Kowalski orders to go and see what all the commotion was about in Alice's office last night. I was almost done telling everybody everything for today, when Kowalski jumping into the H.Q. "Speak man." I commanded him. He was out of breath and looked excited and worried, which was making me anxious. "We are getting a new transfer." Kowalski 発言しました when he caught his breath. "New transfer!" I exclaimed. "Tell us more" Private 発言しました anxiously. "Well..."...
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added by Bitt3rman
Source: me
added by Rikopriski
Source: Best Foes
added by Sassl