1) Follow complete strangers around for 10 minutes, then speak into your 襟, 首輪 and say, "Harrold, we have a situation. Subject 367 is unresponsive. Code 163!"

2) When あなた get onto the elevator, laugh hysterically for 5 seconds, then glare at the other passengers as if they are crazy.

3)Run up the "down" escalators, shrieking hysterically, and when あなた reach the top, fall silent and glare at other shoppers as if they are crazy.

4) Approach a stranger in any Wal-Mart and hand them a へら, スパチュラ, ヘラ and say, with authority, "The future of the Earth depends on it." Abruptly turn around and walk away....

-It's impossible to sneeze with your eyes open.

-People say "Bless you" when あなた sneeze because when あなた sneeze, your ハート, 心 stops for a millisecond.

-It is physically impossible for pigs to look up into the sky

-111,111,111 x 111,111,111 = 12,345,678,987,654,321

-All polar bears are left handed.

-Butterflies taste with their feet.

-A カタツムリ can sleep for three years.

-Elephants are the only 動物 that can't jump

-On average, people fear spiders もっと見る than they do death.

-The cigarette lighter was invented before the match.

-Women blink nearly twice as much as men!!

-Men can read smaller print than women,...

Ride mechanical 馬 with coins fished out of the reflecting pond.
Try pants on backwards at GAP. Ask the salesperson if they make your butt look big.
Dial 900 numbers from demonstration phones in Radio Shack.
Sneeze on the sample tray at Hickory Farms and helpfully volunteer to consume its now unwanted contents.
At the bottom of an escalator, scream “My SHOELACES! AAAGH!”
Ask the sales personnel at the 音楽 store whether inflated CD prices are in pesos または rubles.
Teach pet store parrots new vocabulary that makes them unsalable.
Stomp on ketchup packets at Burger King . . . but save a few...

Act like あなた know the order taker from somewhere. Say, "BedWetter’s Camp, right?"
Add extra letters to words, ex: ピザ becomes pizzzzzzzaaaaaaa
After ordering, say, "I wonder what THIS button on the phone does." Simulate a cutoff.
Amuse the order taker with little-known facts about country music.
Answer their 質問 with questions.
Ask about ピザ maintenance and repair.
Ask for a deal available somewhere else. (e.g., If phoning Domino's, ask for a Cheeser! Cheeser!)
Ask for chips/fries with everything!
Ask for extra homo-sapien
Ask for the guy who took your order last time.
Ask how many...