1) I can't reach my license unless あなた hold my beer. (OK in Texas)

2) Sorry, Officer, I didn't realize my radar detector wasn't plugged in.

3) Aren't あなた the guy from the Village People?

4) Hey, あなた must've been doin' about 125 mph to keep up with me. Good job!

5) Are あなた Andy または Barney?

6) I thought あなた had to be in relatively good physical condition to be a police officer

7) You're not gonna check the trunk, are you?

8) I pay your salary!

9) Gee, Officer! That's terrific. The last officer only gave me a warning, too!

10) Do あなた know why あなた pulled me over? Okay, just so one of us does.

11) I was trying to keep up with traffic. Yes, I know there are no other cars around. That's how far ahead of me they are.

12) When the Officer says "Gee Son....Your eyes look red, have あなた been drinking?" あなた probably shouldn't respond with,"Gee Officer your eyes look glazed, have あなた been eating doughnuts?"

13) What? あなた need a license to drive?

14) Wow, no wonder your wife sleeps around, with your breath!

15) Is your power a penis substitute?

16) Yes, I know my driving is not 100%, but あなた have to agree that it is still pretty good for someone who is completely drunk

17) Can あなた come back in 5 minutes? I'm in the middle of a telephone conversation.

18) Oops...I thought あなた were a prostitute.

19) Do I have any fruits または vegetables? I don't know. Is cocaine a フルーツ または vegetable?

20) A hundred dollar fine? Well, I think George Washington can change your mind

21) Did あなた pull me over because of the drugs under the seat, the body in the trunk, または the burned out tail-light?

22) Whoops, that's the fake one... here ya go, this is the one.

23) Gee, that gut sure doesn't inspire confidence

24) Is it true that guys become cops because they can't work at McDonald's ?

25) Thanks Officer, that last cop only gave me a warning, too

26) My gun fell off my lap and got lodged on the gas pedal

27) Hey, is that a 9mm ? That's nothing compared to this .44 magnum!

28) Do あなた have any idea how much of a hurry I'm in?

29) You're lucky this car needs a tune-up または you'd have never caught me

30) In California we drive like that all the time, what's the problem?

31) If you'd try the stuff I just had, あなた wouldn't be so damn uptight

32) Aren't there real crooks somewhere あなた should be catching?

33) Well, those two other guys didn't stop for that school bus either

34) Yes, I saw your lights on, but I thought あなた going to get a doughnut

35) Just had to try out that new siren, didn't you?

36) Do あなた have any idea who you're talking to?

37) There's no way I was going 85. I had the cruise set at 80.

38) What's wrong, Ossifer? I swear to drunk I'm not God! And really, there is no blood in my alchohol

39) That uniform makes your 尻, お尻 look really big.

40) あなた don't happen to have any ビール in your car?

41) I was going to be cop, but I decided to finish high school instead.

42) So what if I was speeding? Whatcha gonna do about it Mr. Hotshot?

43) I'm not as think as あなた stoned I am.

44) Officer: "Do あなた know how fast あなた were going"
Driver "No I'm too stoned to remember"

45) Its tobacco, honest

46) Hey, i bet i can grab that gun before あなた finish 書く my ticket!

47) Officer: Sir, have あなた been drinking?
>Driver: No, I haven't had any cunts tonight drinkstable.