Okay so my brother and I were swimming in our pool and suddenly we start talking Twilight.Well, if あなた know us then あなた know that we stared role playing.Mason REALLY wanted to be Edward so I let him.And I was Emmett. And so I started thinking of a joke paragraph.I REALLY hope あなた guys like it.

Emmett's pov.

"Where is Edward?!?", I thought to myself. I had been searching our property for well around 5 分 and I knew he could hear my thoughts.
" Up here Em.", he 発言しました chuckling from his room all the way upstairs. He knew I would hear.I was still in the forest.I was up and in his room in a record 4 seconds. または at least record for a human. "jeese Edward!Couldn't have let that go on longer?",I 発言しました a bit sharply.

"No.I was getting bored.", he said.

"Okay well, let's get down to bussiness shall we? I thought up another way to annoy Alice.", I said.
" I'm all ears."
" Well, I figured out a way to fart!!!How totally awesome is THAT?", I 発言しました in a rush.
"Very awesome."
Man. Why was he keeping his anserws so short? " So you'll hurry up and tell me how to fart.", he 発言しました a little impatient. " Jeese.", I 発言しました again. He sighed. "Alright. So if あなた can gulp down enough air and concentrate really hard あなた can fart.", I 発言しました triumphently. "And how did あなた come across this?", he 発言しました chuckling, for he already knew the anserw. "Never mind that", I snapped. Was he doiing his best to irritate me in my moment of glory? " Yes.", he 発言しました fighting a smile. " Stop that!", I 発言しました sharply. "See watch.I'll demonstrate.", I said. I took a deep breath that no human could take and took two もっと見る just to be on the 安全, 安全です side. Now for the embarrassung part. The concentrating. I balled my hands in fists nd benter. I must have looked like a conctapated kid, because he was on the ground holding his sides and booming with laughter in half a second. "Hey cut it out または あなた won't hear it ", I said. " Oh.I WON'T?", he retorted clearly enjoying himself. But at least he cut it out.Then finally brpf( ランダム letters =fart sounds, the もっと見る letters the longer the fart)."Of course I'll have to work on it, but...", I 発言しました clearly proud. "Oh that's for SURE!!", he 発言しました laughing again."Let's go practice.", he 発言しました eager to learn.


*********



"Oh Alice...", we chimed.
"What is it?", she stated obviously annoyed.
"We just wanted to 表示する あなた something.", we 発言しました in unison once more. "Oh this aught to be good.", 発言しました rosalie ,nudging Jasper.We each sucked in a REEEEEEEEALY deep breath. For Alice, Jacob, Carlisle,Esme, Rosalie, and Jasper were there.(Bella and Renesmee were visiting Charlie and amazingly Jacob was visiting me.Or at least staying for the game. Flat screen あなた know.)We balled our fists knelt down and...........bfr dfr.And then a thunder storm broke out.Everyone was on the ground rolling, holding their sides and BOOMING with laughter. While we stood there gawking at them. It had taken weeks of hard core practice to get that far, and last time it lasted 20 seconds!!! Even Alice was laughing. "aren't あなた the least bit disgusted?!?", I asked. "That.. was... just.. too... funny.", she gasped."Nice one guys!!", joked Jacob. "Man it took 6 weeks to get that far!", I 発言しました irritatedly. HDSHGHEHRHGHRTGJHDFJGLDFHHTIHRIYTHDSFGHUER!!!!! "And that took about 2 seconds!", smiled Jacob."Well it's harder for ヴァンパイア to fart okay Mr. Showoff!", I said."OH MY GOD! JACOB! WHAT DID あなた EAT?!?!?!?!", laughed Carlisle. によって now everyone was outside at least 1 mile away from the house.
"Well, Jake. At least あなた can annoy Alice.", i laughed as we sprinted from the contaminated house.(Both holding our noses I might add) Just then Alice charges at us staring daggers at Jacob. "You, mutt. come here.", 発言しました Alice. "No way! I may be half dog but even I'm not that stupid.", 発言しました Jacob cautiously. "No come on. I'm not going to hurt you.", 発言しました Alice もっと見る alluringly now as she flashed one of her smiles that would make any man come to her." That doesn't work on me.", 発言しました Jake. "Then why are あなた coming closer?", 発言しました Alice still trying to lure him in. "Don't do it jake", I whispered. Jake was still walking closer.... And then he was right in front of Alice. "Oh no, I can't watch", I 発言しました still watching." あなた can't but I can.", 発言しました Edward chuckling. によって now everyone was watching.(Even Bella and Nessie, they got back early)Then suddenly, WHACK!!!!! Alice got Jake right on the nose. He jumped and ran for his life. Alice right behind him screaming things like," I JUST WENT SHOPPING THOSE ARE BRAND NEW chanel dresses! NOT TO MENTION ALL OF THE LOUIS VUITTON PURSESAND DOLCE AND GABBANNA DRESSES!!!!!!! AND NOW THEY ARE ALL RUINED!!!!!"she screamed." How much are あなた willing to bet he is going to get his sorry 尻, お尻 knocked around?", 発言しました Edward. "50 bucks says Alice will beat him again in the 次 minute?", I said. "Your on.", 発言しました Edward."Edward aren't あなた going to go help him?", Bella 発言しました worriedly. "Emmett's tougher that I am he can take Alice when she's this mad I can't.", 発言しました Edward getting a bit worried himself."Ahh. But あなた Eddie boy are much faster than I.", I 発言しました knowing I won. "Edward . Please for me I don't want him to get hurt and you're faster than Alice anyway.", begged Bella." Man how cruel is that making your wife beg. Pathetic.", I taunted."Shut. Up. Emmett.", he growled. and then he left to go rescue Jacob from Alice's wrath." あなた know he won't survive right?", I asked. "I kinda figured.", 発言しました Bella. "hey Bella can あなた go make some ポップコーン this is going to be good." " But we don't eat popcorn." "Get it anyway." I 発言しました and sat down to enjoy the 表示する just as Edward got socked in the head."Luxury."