The Mess that is Chuck Bass~ Chapter 5

Chuck sank down on the bed, while he tried to digest what Blair has just 発言しました to him. “You really do 愛 me?” He asked in a quiet voice, not yet quite believing her admission of 愛 for him.
She sat down 次 to him. “Yes Chuck, I really do 愛 you. How could あなた not know?”
He groaned and ran his fingers through his hair. “I don’t know, Blair. I guess I figured that I would always come in 秒 to Nathaniel. He’s the one あなた always chased, not me.”
Blair took his hand in her own, and rubbed his callused knuckles. “That was before, Chuck. I did 愛 Nate, but my 愛 for あなた is so much もっと見る than it was with Nate. I can’t compare it, because あなた mean so much もっと見る to me. You’re my true love, Chuck. あなた always will be.”
Chuck raised his head and looked at her hopefully. “Really?”
She smiled at him. “I’m one hundred percent serious. I 愛 あなた so much, and it hurts me to see あなた in so much pain. I just want to try and make it better.”
They shared a look of understanding, and he put his arm around Blair and pulled her to his chest. She snuggled into him.
“I know you’re trying to help me, Blair.” Chuck began. “But I don’t think あなた realize how much pain I’m in. Bart was a bastard, but it just doesn’t feel right without him here. I’m broken inside, Blair.”
She looked at Chuck’s vacant eyes, and felt her ハート, 心 break for him. “You’re not going to be broken forever, Chuck. I know it’s hard right now, but slowly we’ll make it better. I have no idea what you’re going through, because nothing like this has ever happened to me. I’ll make あなた a promise though Chuck. If it’s the last thing I ever do, I am going to make あなた feel whole and alive again.”
He bolted up from the ベッド and began pacing around the room. “I don’t think あなた can. This is just so fucking hard! I don’t want to involve あなた in this. Just go back to New York.”
Blair closed her eyes and groaned. He was shutting her out again. She looked at him and saw the grief on his race, and that made her want to fight for him even more. “I’m already involved, Chuck. I am not going to let あなた go through this alone.” She got up and wrapped her arms around his waist.
Chuck quickly moved away from her. “I can’t do this right now, Blair. I just can’t.”
She heard the raw pain in his voice, and knew she had to back off for now. Blair nodded. “Alright. I know it’s going to take some time before あなた let me in. I’ll leave あなた alone for a while. But if あなた need me, あなた know I’m just a phone call away.”
She turned to leave, but Chuck grabbed her arm. “Thank you.” He whispered gravely.
“You’re welcome.” Blair kissed the 上, ページのトップへ of his head and left.

XOXO
She had left him alone for six days now, but she Blair was getting desperate to see him now. She had wanted to give him some time away from herself, so he could assimilate everything that she had told him. She planned on going to see Chuck tomorrow, Blair just hoped that when he saw her this time he would be もっと見る agreeable towards her.
She had sat, stewing in her hotel room for the past week, but Blair decided she was going to go out today and make a fun 日 of it. So she decided to do a little sightseeing. That’s what France is for anyways, right?
Blair went to a few museums, visited the Eiffel Tower, had lunch at a bistro, and visited one of the most famous churches in France. によって all accounts it should have been a marvelous day. But Blair didn’t enjoy herself; she was too busy thinking about Chuck. Even when she didn’t want to think about him, he dominated her thoughts.
She walked back to her hotel, while thinking about how miserable she was without Chuck. She wished he would have called her, but if there was one thing she knew about Chuck it was that he didn’t tell anyone how he was feeling.

XOXO
She entered his room the 次 日 in the late afternoon, only to find that he was nowhere to be seen. Blair sat down in his 机, デスク chair, planning on waiting until he returned. Two hours later and he still had not returned. Blair started feeling a little nervous and hoped with all of her might that he was not buying drugs または a hooker for the night.
Another 時 passed until he finally walked through the door. He saw Blair and mumbled, “Blair? What are あなた still doing here? I thought あなた went back to New York.”
Her face scrunched up. “New York? I told あなた that I wasn’t going back without あなた and I meant it. Where were あなた just now?”
Chuck shut the door to his room and took a シート, 座席 on the bed. “I was taking a long walk. I’ve been doing that a lot lately, just trying to escape from everything. And I figured that あなた went back to New York, because I haven’t seen あなた in days.” He said, his tone sounding slightly hurt.
Blair looked at him carefully, and decided that he looked a little better since the last time she had seen him. Although he still looked very fragile, like he could come apart and snap at any moment. She went to sit 次 to him on the bed, and Chuck scooted over making room for her.
“Of course I wouldn’t just leave, Chuck. I thought that あなた wanted me to give あなた some time alone, so that’s what I did. あなた didn’t think I would give up on あなた that easily, did you?”
Chuck 発言しました nothing; he just looked at her with his grief stricken eyes. She moved even closer to him, and laid her head on his shoulder. “Chuck, I need あなた to confide in me. Tell me how you’re feeling, so I can help you.”
At her words, Chuck moved away from her and buried his head in his hands. “I can’t, Blair. I just don’t know how too.”His voice broke.
Blair rubbed his shoulder until she saw him look at her. She saw the unshed tears in his eyes. “I’ll go first. I’ll tell あなた something that I never even told Serena.”
He swallowed nervously. He was very anxious to hear what Blair was about to tell him.
Blair sighed. “This is very hard for me to say. I just want あなた to know how much I believe in あなた Chuck, and that’s why I’m telling あなた this.” She took another deep breath before continuing. “The worst 日 of my life was when I found out my parents were getting a divorce. I know people’s parents get divorced all the time, but it just destroyed me. Things like that aren’t supposed to happen to Blair Waldorf. But it did, and I can’t change that. It was horrible when I found out that my father was in 愛 with a model. A male model.” She laughed bitterly at this. “I’m a little ashamed to admit this, but I’ve always favored my father over my mother. She’s just so cold, while dad is warm and loving.”
Blair felt tears running down her face at the memories of this, while Chuck was unconsciously rubbing her neck. He was trying to comfort her, when she was the one that was supposed to be there for him.
She continued. “This is the part that nobody knows, well except for あなた now. I went to my father and begged him not to leave us. I asked him to pick me over Roman. He didn’t. I guess he just didn’t 愛 me enough. I pleaded with him for days, but he still left with Roman. And to this 日 it still breaks my ハート, 心 that he did this to me.”
Blair glanced up at Chuck and saw that he was staring at her with quiet intensity. He was still rubbing her neck, dragging his thumb over the pulse point. “You father loves you, Blair. How could anybody not 愛 you? I want あなた to know how much it means to me that あなた told me this, when you’ve never told anyone else. Thank you.”
Blair smiled at him, tears still running down her face. She wiped them away. “Thank あなた for saying that, Chuck.” She ran her hand up his thigh. “Are あなた going to tell me something now?” Blair asked, praying that he would.
Chuck stared at her hand on his thigh, and placed his own hand over hers. He sighed deeply. “Yes, Blair. I’m going to tell あなた something.”
She waited patiently for whatever he was going to tell her. Chuck looked around the room, trying to will himself to tell Blair this. His eyes landed on a 花 pot, and he chose to speak to this instead of directly at Blair.
He took several deep breaths and waited for the anger to stop rolling around in his stomach. Then he began. “I know Bart’s always hated me. I’m not the son he’s expected.”
Blair interrupted him. “That’s not true, Chuck.”
He shot her an annoyed look. “It is true. Will あなた let me just tell あなた first before あなた interrupt me?” When she didn’t say anything else on the matter, Chuck continued. “Bart tried to mold me into the perfect son because I didn’t meet his standards. He wasn’t pleased with who I had become. He told me on もっと見る than one occasion, that all I would ever amount to is a womanizing, drunken slacker.”
Blair gasped at the hateful words that Bart had told his own son. She had to bite her lip from saying anything. She had promised him though; that she would wait until he was finished before she voiced her opinion. Blair moved even closer to him on the bed, and laid her head on his shoulder. He stiffened when he felt this, but the Chuck wrapped his arm around her waist anyways.
“Bart and I have never really gotten along. But when Lily told me that he was dead, the pain just coursed its way through my body. Pain like I had never felt before. Something in me died with him that night. He’s gone forever Blair, and I’m never going to be able to see him again. Just too even talk to him.” His voice broke, and tears started pouring out of his eyes. Chuck’s arm tightened around Blair’s waist. “I never got to say goodbye to him. All I ever wanted from Bart was his approval and he never gave it to me. Now it’s too late. I loved him and it kills me that he didn’t 愛 me. Never. In fact you’re the first person that has ever told me that they 愛 me. Bart sure as hell never did.”
When he stopped speaking, Blair got up and bent down in between his knees. She wiped away his tears with the pad of her thumb. “
“I can’t tell あなた how happy I am that あなた just shared something so personal with me. I can’t even imagine how hard that was to tell me. But you’ve got to listen to me, Chuck. Your father did 愛 you.”
Chuck immediately shook his head, but she placed a hand underneath his chin to get him to stop. They looked deeply into each other’s eyes, before she continued.
“Don’t tell me he didn’t, because I know he did. Maybe not how a father should 愛 his son, but Bart loved あなた none the less. I know this for a fact because it’s how my mother loves me. The typical upper east side parent. Cold, calculating, and they 表示する absolutely no emotion. They think they have to be like that so they can strengthen us for the real world. Well that’s how your father was and how my mother is.”Blair glanced at him, and saw that his tears had stopped. “Maybe we’re not so different from each other after all, Chuck. And あなた 発言しました that nobody has ever told あなた that they loved あなた before. Well あなた better get used to those words because you’re going to be hearing them a lot. I 愛 you, Chuck Bass.” Blair finished.
Suddenly she was hauled off her feet as Chuck stood up. He wrapped her in a hug so tight that she could barely breathe. But Blair didn’t care because he had never shown any emotion like this towards her before. She hugged him back tightly, rubbing his back in a soothing gesture. They didn’t speak because words are not necessary at a time like this.
When they finally broke apart, Chuck stared down at the carpet. He looked ashamed of his momentary lapse in not 表示中 any emotion towards her. But then he looked at Blair, and he knew that eventually everything would be alright. So Chuck asked her the question, of what he had wanted to do since he first saw her again.
“I can’t stay in this room another minute, it’s suffocating being in here. I’ve got to get out. Do あなた want to go have ディナー with me?”

To Be Continued…

A/N: Well here is the latest chapter; I hope あなた liked the latest installment. . I’m pretty happy with this chapter. Chuck is somewhat on the road to recovery, all thanks to Blair. So do あなた like this story? If あなた are, I’ve got to ask あなた to review. Thanks. Until the 次 chapter.
~Sam~