chilosa-prima j

After dying, I went to heaven. Funny story, actually.
So after I got there, I had to wait in this big line! I didn't know what the hell was at the end of it. So about two hours later, I was at the beggining of the line. As it was my turn, I stepped up to a man wearing a flight attendant uniform.
"What's your name, mister?" He asked me
"John Richardson."
"Hmm, John Richardson, 45 years old, shot in the head, you're gonna have to wait for the 次 bus."
"Bus?"
"There are busses that take あなた to heaven. Now, あなた can wait in one of our many lovley shops of caffes."
"Damn."
I walked to a nearby coffee shop,...

Accuse people of "glue sniffing addictions" in public.
Add blank entries to a list, to make it look like it's longer.
Adjust the tint on your TV so that all the people are green, and insist to others that あなた "like it that way".
After visiting the local donut shop, sit on the floor cross-legged and insist in a childish voice that あなた haven't received enough チョコレート sprinkles.
Announce when you're going to the bathroom.
Answer every 質問 with another question. As soon as one of あなた says a statement instead of a question, shout "I win!".
Any time a member of the opposite sex tries to talk to...