1.vacuuming too often weakens the carpet fibers.Say this with a serious face,and shudder delicately whenever anyone mentions carpet fresh.
2.Dust bunnies cannot evolve into dust rhinos when disturbed.Rename the area under the ソファー, ソファ "The Galapagos Islands" and claim ecological exemption.
3.Layers of dirty film on windows and screen provides a helpful filter against harmful and aging rays from the sun.Call it a SPF factor of 5 and leave it alone.
4.Cobwebs artfully draped over lampshades reduces the glare from the bulb,thereby creating a romantic atmosphere.If your husband points out that the light fixtures need dusting,simply look affronted and exclaim,"What? and spoil the mood?"
5.In a pinch,you can always claim that the haphazard tower of unread magazines and newspapers 次 to your chair provides the valuable Feng Shui aspect of a tiger,thereby reducing your vulnerability.Roll your eyes when あなた say this.
6.Explain the mound of pet hair brushed up against the doorways によって claiming あなた are collecting it there to use for stuffing hand sewn play 動物 for underprivileged children.
7.If unexpected company is coming,pile everything unsightly into one room and close the door.As あなた 表示する your guests though your tidy home,rattle the door knob vigorously,fake a growl and say,"I'd 愛 あなた to see our Den,but fluffy hates to be disturbed and the shots are SO expensive."
8.If the dusting is REALLY out of control ,simply place a showy urn insist that "THIS is where grandma wanted us to scatter her ashes..."
9.Don't bother repainting.Simply scribble lightly over a dirty ウォール with a assortment of crayons,and try to muster a glint of tears as あなた say,"Junior did this that week before the unspeakable accident...I haven't had the ハート, 心 to clean it..."
10.Mix one-quarter cup pine-scented household cleaner with four cups of water in a spray bottle.Mist the air lightly.Leave dampened rags in conspicuous locations.Develop an exhausted look,throw yourself onto the ソファー, ソファ ,and sigh,"I clean and I clean and I still don't get anywhere..."
*I didn't come up with this ,I found it on the internet*
2.Dust bunnies cannot evolve into dust rhinos when disturbed.Rename the area under the ソファー, ソファ "The Galapagos Islands" and claim ecological exemption.
3.Layers of dirty film on windows and screen provides a helpful filter against harmful and aging rays from the sun.Call it a SPF factor of 5 and leave it alone.
4.Cobwebs artfully draped over lampshades reduces the glare from the bulb,thereby creating a romantic atmosphere.If your husband points out that the light fixtures need dusting,simply look affronted and exclaim,"What? and spoil the mood?"
5.In a pinch,you can always claim that the haphazard tower of unread magazines and newspapers 次 to your chair provides the valuable Feng Shui aspect of a tiger,thereby reducing your vulnerability.Roll your eyes when あなた say this.
6.Explain the mound of pet hair brushed up against the doorways によって claiming あなた are collecting it there to use for stuffing hand sewn play 動物 for underprivileged children.
7.If unexpected company is coming,pile everything unsightly into one room and close the door.As あなた 表示する your guests though your tidy home,rattle the door knob vigorously,fake a growl and say,"I'd 愛 あなた to see our Den,but fluffy hates to be disturbed and the shots are SO expensive."
8.If the dusting is REALLY out of control ,simply place a showy urn insist that "THIS is where grandma wanted us to scatter her ashes..."
9.Don't bother repainting.Simply scribble lightly over a dirty ウォール with a assortment of crayons,and try to muster a glint of tears as あなた say,"Junior did this that week before the unspeakable accident...I haven't had the ハート, 心 to clean it..."
10.Mix one-quarter cup pine-scented household cleaner with four cups of water in a spray bottle.Mist the air lightly.Leave dampened rags in conspicuous locations.Develop an exhausted look,throw yourself onto the ソファー, ソファ ,and sigh,"I clean and I clean and I still don't get anywhere..."
*I didn't come up with this ,I found it on the internet*
I was like totally like walking like down the like, cotton キャンディー road like 45 like 秒 前 and I like saw a hot like dog and totally yelled, "Like あなた like skinny little like pot head like monkey." And then I like totally like kicked a puppy. Then I like went ホーム and like told my brother I like think he like is a like talking wierner with like talking wierner powers that like let him like mow the lawn.
That was like a like better like 日 in the like life of a like polar bear.
~dinglebell14
P.S. ~ Don't あなた wanna mix cotton キャンディー and popscicles!
That was like a like better like 日 in the like life of a like polar bear.
~dinglebell14
P.S. ~ Don't あなた wanna mix cotton キャンディー and popscicles!
Dear Mark,
I wish I could say sorry または 愛 あなた more, but I can't no more...
I can only leave あなた with my ring and this last letter.
I have ロスト myself and don't try to call me または come to me, I am dead now.
I only wish that I could come back to あなた and say my apologies, but I a saying that for letting me go.
Please keep this a secret and the ring, cause if あなた let it go, bad things could happen.
Don't even try to sell your soul to save me, please don't...
Just keep me secret from everyone, I want everyone to be calm and remember that I will always be there...
and あなた too Mark, I will always be there, in your heart, and in my others.
あなた will have your own life, everything あなた wanted with you.
あなた will have a wife, kids, a mansion, and die in your warm ベッド when your old, knowing that あなた did a good life.
Remember that ok Mark.
I 愛 you, I 愛 あなた so much...
~Reah
I wish I could say sorry または 愛 あなた more, but I can't no more...
I can only leave あなた with my ring and this last letter.
I have ロスト myself and don't try to call me または come to me, I am dead now.
I only wish that I could come back to あなた and say my apologies, but I a saying that for letting me go.
Please keep this a secret and the ring, cause if あなた let it go, bad things could happen.
Don't even try to sell your soul to save me, please don't...
Just keep me secret from everyone, I want everyone to be calm and remember that I will always be there...
and あなた too Mark, I will always be there, in your heart, and in my others.
あなた will have your own life, everything あなた wanted with you.
あなた will have a wife, kids, a mansion, and die in your warm ベッド when your old, knowing that あなた did a good life.
Remember that ok Mark.
I 愛 you, I 愛 あなた so much...
~Reah