In case あなた needed further proof that the human race is doomed through stupidity, here are some actual labels on consumer goods:
On a Sears hairdryer: Do not use while sleeping.(that's the only time I have to work on my hair)
On a bag of Fritos! ..You could be a winner! No purchase necessary. Details inside. (the shoplifter special)?
On a bar of Dial soap: "Directions: Use like regular soap." (and that would be how?...)
On some Swanson アナと雪の女王 dinners: "Serving suggestion: Defrost." (but, it's just a suggestion).
On Tesco's ティラミス デザート (printed on bottom): "Do not turn upside down." (well...duh, a bit late, huh!)
On Marks & Spencer パン Pudding: "Product will be hot after heating." (...and あなた thought?...)
On packaging for a Rowenta iron: "Do not iron clothes on body." (but wouldn't this save me もっと見る time?)
On Boot's Children Cough Medicine: "Do not drive a car または operate machinery after taking this medication." (We could do a lot to reduce the rate of construction accidents if we could just get those 5-year-olds with head-colds off those forklifts.)
On Nytol Sleep Aid: "Warning: May cause drowsiness." (and.. .I'm taking this because?...)
On most brands of クリスマス lights: "For indoor または outdoor use only." (as opposed to...what?)
On a Japanese 食 processor: "Not to be used for the other use." (now, somebody out there, help me on this. I'm a bit curious.)
On Sunsbury's peanuts: "Warning: contains nuts." (talk about a news flash)
On an American Airlines packet of nuts: "Instructions: Open packet, eat nuts." (Step 3: maybe, uh...fly Delta?)
On a child's スーパーマン costume: "Wearing of this 衣服 does not enable あなた to fly." (I don't blame the company. I blame the parents for this one.)
On a Swedish chainsaw: "Do not attempt to stop chain with your hands." (...was there a lot of this happening somewhere)
On a Sears hairdryer: Do not use while sleeping.(that's the only time I have to work on my hair)
On a bag of Fritos! ..You could be a winner! No purchase necessary. Details inside. (the shoplifter special)?
On a bar of Dial soap: "Directions: Use like regular soap." (and that would be how?...)
On some Swanson アナと雪の女王 dinners: "Serving suggestion: Defrost." (but, it's just a suggestion).
On Tesco's ティラミス デザート (printed on bottom): "Do not turn upside down." (well...duh, a bit late, huh!)
On Marks & Spencer パン Pudding: "Product will be hot after heating." (...and あなた thought?...)
On packaging for a Rowenta iron: "Do not iron clothes on body." (but wouldn't this save me もっと見る time?)
On Boot's Children Cough Medicine: "Do not drive a car または operate machinery after taking this medication." (We could do a lot to reduce the rate of construction accidents if we could just get those 5-year-olds with head-colds off those forklifts.)
On Nytol Sleep Aid: "Warning: May cause drowsiness." (and.. .I'm taking this because?...)
On most brands of クリスマス lights: "For indoor または outdoor use only." (as opposed to...what?)
On a Japanese 食 processor: "Not to be used for the other use." (now, somebody out there, help me on this. I'm a bit curious.)
On Sunsbury's peanuts: "Warning: contains nuts." (talk about a news flash)
On an American Airlines packet of nuts: "Instructions: Open packet, eat nuts." (Step 3: maybe, uh...fly Delta?)
On a child's スーパーマン costume: "Wearing of this 衣服 does not enable あなた to fly." (I don't blame the company. I blame the parents for this one.)
On a Swedish chainsaw: "Do not attempt to stop chain with your hands." (...was there a lot of this happening somewhere)