What would あなた do if...?

Give him the hat, while sneakily placing a tracking device on the hat. Then I would go to the nearest Wal-Mart, buy a chainsaw, use it to go cut the 林檎, アップル into little bits, eat the apple, buy a gun, kill the man, take the hat, smear it in his blood, and wear it as a trophy.

Tazer him. Nobody hits me on the head and gets away with it! Nobody!