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10 Ways to Annoy Esme Cullen

10. Let it slip what Carlisle really does during his night shifts at the hospital, with all of the pretty nurses.

9. Tell her all about the names of your future children, when あなた want to have them, what genders あなた want them to be, etc.

8. Ask her if her hair looks like caramel, does it taste like caramel?

7. Politely ask if Carlisle asks her to dress up as “Nurse. Naughty” in the bedroom and if he demands she calls him “Doctor. Dreamy”

6. Tell her that Carlisle is much too old for her, and that he is clearly a cradle-snatcher または pedophile.

5. Take a chunk...
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Esme’s Diary (Chapter 29: Payback)
August 5, 2012



Dear Diary,

“Not far now,” Edward 発言しました as we sped through the woods. It was the middle of the night and usually I wouldn’t have been able to see a thing in the dim barely moonlit sky, but tonight I could see everything — which was probably a good thing at the speed I was running. I was so lucky that Edward had taken the time to check things out before we came here. The last thing I wanted was to bump into old フレンズ または family.

“I’ve told あなた that won’t happen, he has moved.” Edward smiled, reassuring me.

After some time Edward...
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