#1:
Chris/Ghostface: So anyways, I was saying, what's your お気に入り scary movie?
Sam (Chris' fiancée): Well, the scariest is certainly Dragonball Evolution.
Chris/Ghostface: あなた EVER MENTION THAT FILM AGAIN, I'LL CUT YOUR THROAT, あなた LITTLE BITCH!
[...]
(Sam hangs up, believing this all to be a dumb joke)
Chris/Ghostface: That little 雌犬 made me think of Dragonball Evolution. SHE'S GOING TO DIE!!!
#2:
"So we're watching the movie and things are happening and WHAT THE FUCK IS MICHAEL CAINE DOING IN THIS MOVIE?!"
#3:
"Oh thanks for the stupid ball, Grandpa. Thanks a lot. I appreciate it. Hey, can あなた tell me about this girl thing? I don't know. Can あなた give me some condoms? I need some condoms, okay, Grandpa? I really wanna fuck Chi-Chi. Is that okay? I just need some condoms. Fuck this dumb dragon ball. Sorry! I just wanna go fuck. Is that all right with you?"
#4:
Chris's reaction about how 孫 悟空 has to find all the dragon balls before the eclipse occurs.
Chris: What does that fucking have to do with anything?!
#5:
Chris: If I came ホーム from, like, a store または something, and I found cop cars outside the house, I guarantee that the first thing out of my mouth would not be: (deadpan) "Whoa. What is going on?"
#6:
"Hey, hon, remember at the beginning of the 年 when I 発言しました I was going to try and see as many films as I could regardless of how crappy they looked? Yeah, can あなた go back in time and kill me?"
#7:
"The best part of this movie is the first ten 秒 where あなた see some funny cat 動画 pulled off of YouTube. It's the best part of the movie! Everything else is total SHIT!!!"
#8:
"I wouldn't even call this film Aliens vs. Predator. もっと見る like Shadows vs. Silhouettes...because あなた can't see A DAMN FUCKING THING!"
#9:
Chris: (as monotone as possible, after guzzling down wine) Welcome to my review of The Emoji Movie. (Turns his head, camera shifts) I have proof. (raises ticket, slowly crumbles it up, turns head back around) The Emoji Movie is about the "meh" emoji and how he has other expressions besides "meh". And... today... I went and saw it. And... it... SUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCKED!
#10:
"They have to get to Dropbox, did あなた hear that come of my mouth? It came out of my mouth... (cringes) Dropbox is... an important plot point... in this FUCKING MOVIE!!"
#11:
Chris: After that we actually get a flashback. TO THE SCENE WE JUST SAW!!
Chris/Ghostface: So anyways, I was saying, what's your お気に入り scary movie?
Sam (Chris' fiancée): Well, the scariest is certainly Dragonball Evolution.
Chris/Ghostface: あなた EVER MENTION THAT FILM AGAIN, I'LL CUT YOUR THROAT, あなた LITTLE BITCH!
[...]
(Sam hangs up, believing this all to be a dumb joke)
Chris/Ghostface: That little 雌犬 made me think of Dragonball Evolution. SHE'S GOING TO DIE!!!
#2:
"So we're watching the movie and things are happening and WHAT THE FUCK IS MICHAEL CAINE DOING IN THIS MOVIE?!"
#3:
"Oh thanks for the stupid ball, Grandpa. Thanks a lot. I appreciate it. Hey, can あなた tell me about this girl thing? I don't know. Can あなた give me some condoms? I need some condoms, okay, Grandpa? I really wanna fuck Chi-Chi. Is that okay? I just need some condoms. Fuck this dumb dragon ball. Sorry! I just wanna go fuck. Is that all right with you?"
#4:
Chris's reaction about how 孫 悟空 has to find all the dragon balls before the eclipse occurs.
Chris: What does that fucking have to do with anything?!
#5:
Chris: If I came ホーム from, like, a store または something, and I found cop cars outside the house, I guarantee that the first thing out of my mouth would not be: (deadpan) "Whoa. What is going on?"
#6:
"Hey, hon, remember at the beginning of the 年 when I 発言しました I was going to try and see as many films as I could regardless of how crappy they looked? Yeah, can あなた go back in time and kill me?"
#7:
"The best part of this movie is the first ten 秒 where あなた see some funny cat 動画 pulled off of YouTube. It's the best part of the movie! Everything else is total SHIT!!!"
#8:
"I wouldn't even call this film Aliens vs. Predator. もっと見る like Shadows vs. Silhouettes...because あなた can't see A DAMN FUCKING THING!"
#9:
Chris: (as monotone as possible, after guzzling down wine) Welcome to my review of The Emoji Movie. (Turns his head, camera shifts) I have proof. (raises ticket, slowly crumbles it up, turns head back around) The Emoji Movie is about the "meh" emoji and how he has other expressions besides "meh". And... today... I went and saw it. And... it... SUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCKED!
#10:
"They have to get to Dropbox, did あなた hear that come of my mouth? It came out of my mouth... (cringes) Dropbox is... an important plot point... in this FUCKING MOVIE!!"
#11:
Chris: After that we actually get a flashback. TO THE SCENE WE JUST SAW!!