The Cutest Sneeze

We were heading for Philadalphia having just crossed the Tappan Zee Bridge when Jade was on her laptop.

Sean: Good thing this car has Wi-fi. What are あなた doing?
Jade: I'm sending a message to every brony about the assault on Philadalphia.
Sean: Perfect. We gotta stop to refuel though.

So we stopped at a gas station after getting off the highway.

Jade: I think that store is oepn. Let's get some food!
Sean: Ok.
Hater 643: *drives up in '32 ford*
Sean: Whoa, that's a very cool car.
Hater 643: I found them!
Sean: What?
Hater 643: *pushes me to ground*
Jade: What the heck?
Hater 643: *kicks my face*
Sean:...

Let us visit another part of Trottingham. One that has houses, and streets.

Sheriff: *stops at barn*
Rarity: Thanks for inviting me over here Aunt Lindsay.
Lindsay: No problem Rarity, but unfortunately we need your help.
Rarity: What is it?
Sheriff: *knocks on door*
Lindsay: You're about to find out. Come in!
Sheriff: Good mornin everypony, how are あなた today?
Lindsay: We're fine, just celebrating my son's birthday.
Sheriff: And let's see what あなた got for him, money. Perfect, just what the community needs! *takes money*
Clint: Hey!
Lindsay: If あなた think あなた can steal my son's money you're wrong!
blind...

Applejack: Howdah. Mah frehnds lehft mah her tah faht. An ah dih. Thahs ihs thah storeh abouht thaht. Enjoh. (Applejack: H speak, Twilight Sparkle: synonyms, Pinkie Pie: GAYS HALP speak, Fluttershy: um after each word, 虹 Dash: text speak and Rarity: darling after each sentence)
Rainbow Dash: cum on アップルジャック, applejack u nid 2 go 2 applusa with braburn
Applejack: Nah. Ah dohn't wahnt tah.
Twilight Sparkle: Yet あなた possess challenge move!
Applejack: Nah!
Rainbow Dash: omg applejak u suk
Applejack: Mahby ah douh neuhd tah mouhv tah Applelousa!
Fluttershy: um if um thats um ok um
Rarity: Oh, あなた must go,...