Note: I DID NOT WRITE THIS FIC! Lj user jannika did. FULL CREDIT goes to her. Im only posting this so those without a livejournal can read :)
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It’s not like Alex is worried. Not really. This is just what Justin does, または says he’s going to do. This is his thing, and he never actually does any of it, so, whatever. Alex is sure it’s not a big deal. It’s like how Justin is always saying he’s not going to help her get out of trouble, または that he’s going make her do actual work, または that he’s going to turn her into the authorities. He doesn’t mean any of it, not ever, so Alex is pretty sure this whole, ‘going to college far away thing’ isn’t going to happen either. It’s just one of those Justin things, one もっと見る way of reminding them all how smart he is, as if they could forget, one もっと見る threat he makes that doesn’t actually mean anything.
Still, she can’t just let him say things like that and get away with it. She has to fight with him about it, has to tell him how ridiculous he’s being, because that’s how this works. So, when he’s sitting on the couch, 読書 boring pamphlets on boring colleges in boring far away places, Alex sits down beside him, pulls one out of his hands, and rolls her eyes.
“Justin. We already live in New York.” She says. He sighs and turns to face her,
“So?”
“So it’s New York. People grow up and come to New York. They don’t grow up and leave it.”
“Did あなた just admit that I’m an adult? A grown man?”
“You’re not even a half grown man.”
“I will have あなた know that I’ve been working out, and the other day, I had facial hair. Had to shave it,” Justin says, looking all stupidly proud of himself.
“I’m sure that was thrilling, but, seriously, aren’t there like, a million colleges in New York?”
“Well actually there are-” Justin starts, pouting a little. Alex cuts him off.
“I don’t actually care how many of them there are. But あなた should pick one of them.”
“Why?”
“Because they’d be in New York,” Alex says.
“But, what if I want to see somewhere new?” Justin says, looking all earnest now.
“We live in New York,” Alex repeats, “What else is there to see?”
“Um, I don’t know, maybe the entire rest of the world?”
“Yes. The rest of the world filled with people going, ‘you know where I’ve always wanted to go? New York,’” Alex says. Justin kind of blinks at her, then he shakes his head and stands up. “See?” She says, “You don’t even have a comeback, because あなた know I’m right.”
“I don’t have a comeback because that was ridiculous,” Justin says, “I’m going to go look over these in my room now.” He finishes.
“Whatever. I’ll just come steal them later.”
**
Two weeks later, with the information packets she’d ストール, 盗んだ from Justin’s room and a dozen または so others she’d stolen from the mail before he could open them, Alex makes a mosaic. She cuts the buildings and classrooms and smiling college students and rolling hills up into little pieces and puts them all back together until she’s created New York. It’s all in panels, one for the skyline, another for each of her お気に入り streets, a few for places she knows Justin loves, one for the sub ショップ itself. It’s not like, the best thing she’s ever made または anything, but she kind of likes it, and when she’s blowing off History to finish it in the art room one 日 at school, because she’s completely out of glue at home, Mr. Laritate walks in and tells her he loves it. He raves about it for a few minutes, telling her at least three times that he doesn’t even mind that it doesn’t have cowboys in it. He asks if she’d mind hanging it in the school, and Alex figures that will probably annoy
Justin even more, so she agrees. She’s still not a ファン of making her art for other people, of displaying it someplace like school, but this is different.
She hangs it up in the senior hallway, right across from Justin’s locker, and she’s making sure it’s straight when Justin walks by. He stops and stares, then steps closer to examine all the little pieces.
“Are these..?”
“Yep,” Alex says, smirking.
“I knew they’d all been disappearing!” Justin says. Alex grins again, waiting for him to get mad and for them to start a fight about this that will last all week, または at least until Max causes a disaster of some sort.
Justin doesn’t yell though, he doesn’t pout または tell her she’s irresponsible または anything like that, he just runs a hand through his hair then turns to looks at her.
“What?” She asks.
“You know, it would be a lot easier to be mad at あなた if this wasn’t so good,” He says. Then he kind of half smiles and turns and walks away, and Alex doesn’t know what to say to that. Not at all.
**
One night, after Justin has spent the 日 actually filling out applications and 書く essays for stupid, far away colleges, Harper comes over, and they put on Clueless. Justin makes fun of it, rolls his eyes and calls Alex shallow, but then he makes ポップコーン and sits down with them, hooked pretty much instantly. They sit in silence for a little bit, saying a few lines along with the movie but mostly just sitting, until, on screen, Cher says,
“Shouldn’t あなた go to an East Coast school? I hear girls at NYU aren’t at all particular,” and Alex grins and steals a handful of Justin’s ポップコーン and says,
“Hear that Justin? NYU sounds perfect for you.”
“Funny,” Justin says, rolling his eyes.
“Oh my gosh, Justin!” Harper says, turning around, “You should totally go to NYU, because I was thinking about applying there, and then we could go together, and be college buddies, and I could make us outfits in purple, または with bobcats on them, and we could walk to class together and get coffee together, only I don’t drink coffee, but あなた could get coffee and-”
“Harper,” Alex cuts her off, “stop.”
“Sorry,” Harper says, blushing a little. Justin shifts a little in his seat, looking slightly uncomfortable, but the movie grabs all their attention again a few 分 later, things are normal again.
**
While Justin is interviewing somewhere much too far away, Alex considers paying an elf to come pretend to be his girlfriend, and make him stay home. It’s a good plan, really, Justin wouldn’t be able to resist, and there would be an elf around all the time, which would be kind of perfect. But, Alex doesn’t really want to have to pay someone to take care of this, even if she would be using Justin’s money. She’s pretty sure getting Justin to stay shouldn’t be so much work, または any work at all, really. (And besides, she’s pretty sure that eventually someone would catch on to the whole elf thing, and then everyone would be all mad at her and blah, blah, blah.) So, she just throws a lot もっと見る コメント about New York being amazing and about college being lame anyway around when Justin gets home.
He pretends to ignore her, but she knows he’s listening.
**
One night, when Justin has actually gotten acceptance letters from several colleges and has been discussing them with their father in the キッチン for hours, Alex storms in,
“What about the Wizard competition?” She demands. Justin stares at her.
“What about it?”
“How can we have it if you’re not here?” She asks, and she knows, she knows what a ridiculous 質問 it is, but she’s feeling so frustrated and angry that she doesn’t care. Justin raises his eyebrows so high they
almost hit his hairline,
“Magically?”
“But あなた won’t be here!”
“The Wizard completion won’t be here! And I can get to wherever it is magically, and it doesn’t really matter, because even if I don’t 表示する up, I’ll win.” Justin says, crossing his arms over his chest. She glares at him.
“Whatever,” she says, turning on her heels and walking away. Later, she thinks that might be the first fight they’ve ever had that she’s actually lost, and it makes her chest ache, and she hates it.
**
Justin is packed, he’s packed and he’s making lists and checking them fourteen times to make sure he has everything he’ll need when he gets to the college Alex always pretends to not know the name of. It’s a lie; she’s at their website every day, glaring at the countdown to freshman orientation clock and wondering how to curse an entire university, but saying it out loud, giving it a name, just makes her angrier. She’s started leaving the room whenever it comes up, which means she’s been spending a lot of time によって herself because all her parents can talk about these days is Justin and college, and it’s driving Alex crazy.
She can’t believe it’s actually happening, that he’s actually leaving, but half is stuff is already in boxes and their mom is cooking all his お気に入り meals and they’ve even hired a new waiter to work at the sub station.
The new guy’s name is Zack, and when Alex isn’t in her room glaring at the computer, she’s sitting in the restaurant, flirting with him. He’s not all that cute, and she’s not actually into him, but it gives her something to do, and it makes Justin really angry, something about keeping Zack from his work, so she keeps it up. He tries to actually ask her out a few times, and she turns him down with various excuses he seems to believe. Then, the 日 before Justin is supposed to leave, Alex and Zack are alone in the shop, and he sits down with her and grabs her hand and tells her how hot she is and then he leans フォワード, 前進, 楽しみにして and kisses her, and ew. Alex is bored before it even really begins, and they’re still in her family’s restaurant, and she should really push him off and yell at him for this, but then she hears footsteps. Justin’s footsteps. So, she throws her arms around Zack’s neck and scoots closer to him and braces herself for the way Justin is about to totally freak out. He doesn’t disappoint her.
“ALEX,” He yells, storming over to them, almost running, he grabs Alex’s arm and pulls her up out of her chair.
“Chill out, dude,” Zack says, glaring at Justin. There is a 秒 then, when Justin bristles and lets out a long breath and when Alex actually thinks he’s going to hit Zack, that he’s actually going to パンチ him, but then it passes and Justin relaxes, just a little.
“You,” he says to Zack, “are fired. Get out.”
“You can’t 火災, 火 me!” Zack protests.
“Actually, I can. And I’d leave before I tell my father about this if I were you,” Justin says. Then, before Zack can say anything else, Justin tugs on Alex’s arm and pulls her back into the kitchen.
“You’re not really going to tell dad, are you?” Alex asks, shaking out of his hold. Justin glares at her.
“What was that?” Justin demands.
“See, Justin, I know あなた don’t have much experience, but that’s what we normal people call kissing,” Alex says.
“You don’t even like Zack!” Justin says, ignoring her last comment.
“Sure I do.”
“No. あなた don’t. I can tell.”
“Whatever. I can キッス whoever I want,” Alex says.
“Not in the middle of the sub ショップ at two in the afternoon! Not people あなた don’t even like! Not guys like Zack.”
“What’s wrong with guys like Zack?”
“Everything,” Justin spits.
“Daddy liked him. He hired him,” Alex protests.
“Dad liked him because he was ok with getting paid in sandwiches.”
“Whatever,” Alex repeats, “Are we done?”
“No. We’re not. I still want to know why あなた were キス Zack.”
“Why do あなた care?”
“Sub Shop. Two in the afternoon. New employee. Not a good guy. あなた キス him.” Justin lists, talking slow like it should be obvious.
“You’re leaving tomorrow,” Alex says.
“What does that have to do with anything?”
“Tomorrow, you’ll be gone. Then I can キッス the entire school and you’ll never know.” Justin stares at her, looks her up and down like he’s trying to figure her out.
“I don’t understand what my going to college has to do with あなた キス ランダム guys,” He says.
“You’re leaving,” She says again.
“And you’re what, punishing me?”
“Maybe. Is it working?” She asks, and his eyes flash and her stomach flips in anticipation because this is really getting to him, really upsetting him, and that’s all she’d wanted.
“You know what, Alex?” He fumes, “I don’t have time for this. You’re right. I’m leaving tomorrow, and it would be really nice if あなた could just happy for me. If for once in our lives あなた could act like me getting something good wasn’t somehow terrible for you. If あなた could be excited with me. But I guess that’s too much to ask for,” He finishes, storming out of the kitchen, leaving Alex speechless. Again.
**
Justin doesn’t speak to her for the rest of the day, like, actually doesn’t speak to her, not the normal not speaking to her when they just argue more. Their parents exchange worried glances, and even Max looks really confused. Alex tosses and turns in bed, angry and sad and this is not how things are supposed to be.
He’s leaving, he’s actually leaving and he’s actually mad her and she doesn’t know what to do. He can’t leave, can’t leave her here to fix her own messes and get herself out of trouble, can’t leave her here with no one to fight with, can’t leave her here with no one on her side. She’s so restless and so furious and so hurt she can’t stand it, so, at around midnight, she gets out of ベッド and walks to Justin’s room. She just sits on his ベッド and stares at him for a second, trying to figure out what to say, how to wake up him, but then he throws he totally off によって speaking first.
“What do あなた want, Alex?” He asks, not even opening his eyes.
“Are あなた really mad at me?” She asks. He sighs and opens his eyes and sits up, just a little.
“You’ve been meaner to me this summer than in our whole lives, you’ve been snapping at me for weeks, あなた flat out told me in キッチン あなた kissed Zack just to make me angry, and you’re worried about me being mad at you?”
“Yes.”
“I don’t know. Are あなた mad at me?” He asks, sighing again.
“Kind of,” She admits.
“Kind of? Why?”
“Because you’re leaving.”
“So?”
“So あなた 発言しました あなた wouldn’t,” Alex says, and then regrets it, because she really hadn’t been planning on going there, hadn’t been planning on admitting any of the things that come along with going there. Things about missing him and stuff, but now it’s out there and Justin is sitting up completely and staring at her.
“What are あなた talking about?” He asks. Alex looks down at her hands, then at his comforter, then at his walls, and tries to think of a way not answer him, “Alex?” He prompts after a minute, voice all soft and sincere like it had been then, and she can’t stop herself.
“You 発言しました you’d never leave me,” Alex says, “That あなた could never leave me.”
“What?”
“You said. When we had to have the wizard competition early and I won, and then あなた didn’t remember me, あなた started to lose your memories and I asked あなた not to leave me and あなた 発言しました あなた never would.”
“Alex-” Justin starts, but Alex cuts him off and keeps going,
“You 発言しました あなた never would, あなた didn’t even remember who I was, but あなた 発言しました あなた knew あなた could never leave me. And now あなた are. Now you’re leaving and that’s not how it’s supposed to be, we have to do things together, me and you, あなた 発言しました that too, remember? We can do impossible things and fight our way through jungles and get our parents back together, but only because we’re together. And I know あなた have to go to college, and I know you’re smart and あなた deserve it and I know it’s supposed to be a good thing, but あなた didn’t even ask me. And あなた 発言しました you’d never leave,” Alex says, her words all in a rush, a thousand things she’d never meant to say out loud, things she hadn’t even let herself think, and now they’re out and Justin is staring at her, just staring and staring and part of Alex just wants to run.
“I remember,” He says after a minute.
“You do?”
“I’d forgotten until あなた 発言しました it, but I remember now. We were so scared, and I couldn’t remember anything, but あなた were there, and あなた were begging me not to go and I-”
“And あなた what?”
“And I didn’t know anything, didn’t know who I was または where I was または who あなた were, but I knew I- knew I loved you,” Justin says. Alex smiles, just a little.
“Yeah?”
“Yeah. But it wasn’t like,” Justin stops and shakes his head, “do あなた remember, when all that was happening and we were trying to find the stone of dreams and there were those times, just for a second, when I’d look at あなた and forget あなた were you. Only not really, because I knew あなた were you, I just didn’t know あなた were my sister.”
“What?” Alex asks, even though she knows exactly what he means, and even though this, even もっと見る than the missing him thing, is somewhere she never wanted this conversation to go.
“It was like that at the end- I knew I loved あなた and I couldn’t leave you, but I didn’t know why, I didn’t know あなた were my sister, but あなた were あなた and I couldn’t,” Justin says.
“But あなた can now,” Alex says, “and あなた know exactly who I am.”
“I’m not leaving you, I’m going to college, there is a difference.”
“It doesn’t feel like it,” Alex says. Justin grabs her hand and tugs her a little closer.
“There were times, in the jungle, によって the fire, when I forgot あなた were my sister,” he says.
“We covered that already, Justin,” Alex says, but she shivers a little anyway because she gets it. She knows what he’s saying.
“I still forget some days. Just for a second, sometimes, when I look at you. I forget,” he admits, and who knew Justin could be so brave? He’s gripping her hand tighter now, and there is this look in his eyes she hardly ever sees, that one where he’s made a decision, but one he’s not all that sure of, one he thinks could get him trouble, get them all in trouble. (Last time she saw it he was telling her how he’d had to let Juliette go with that mummy.)
“Why?” She asks, and no, her voice isn’t shaking, because she’s Alex Russo, and things like that don’t happen to her.
“Because I’m thinking about this,” Justin says, and then he’s キス her. Then they’re キス and Alex’s entire body is reacting and when she pulls away a 分 later she’s so overwhelmed she doesn’t know what to do with herself.
“Oh,” She manages, breathing heavy, ハート, 心 racing.
“Yeah.”
“So, this is really scary, right?” She asks. He nods.
“The scariest thing we’ve ever faced.”
“You can’t leave me alone with it,” She says, and it sounds pathetic and clingy, but this is Justin, and he won’t care.
“I’m not. I have breaks and summers when I’ll be home. And we have magic. あなた can come see me,” He says, running his hands through her hair. She nods. It’s not the same, not the same at all, and there is a little part of her that is still so angry with him, but it’s smaller now, hurts less. Still, she has to know something,
“You’re not leaving because of this, are you? Because of when あなた forget?” She asks, vocalizing something she’s been wondering all along at the back of her mind and late and night at when she’s really, really mad at him.
“That should be why I’m leaving, but I’m not strong enough for that,” He says, and then he catches her eye, and she nods, and they キッス again, and Alex has to stop herself from actually, physically clinging to him.
It’s almost surreal, the way it’s finally happening, the way it’s so, so wrong and so weird, and yet perfect and not weird at all. It makes part of her wonder why they didn’t start キス years ago, even though, obviously, she knows exactly why. There are probably a million things they should talk about, things they should say, but she’s pretty sure talking about it all is Justin’s job, and he’s leaving in the morning, and they don’t have time. So she just keeps キス him back, キス and キス and falling into him, and when they finally pull apart, he tugs on her arm and pulls her down into ベッド with him and wraps an arm around her.
“Stay here?” He whispers.
“Duh,” she returns, smiling. He kisses the back of her head, and her ハート, 心 goes all stupidly girly and melty.
“I could never leave you,” He whispers, pulling her close, and even though he’s doing exactly that in like, five hours, right now, Alex can convince herself they’ll stay like this, wrapped in his covers and each other, forever.
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It’s not like Alex is worried. Not really. This is just what Justin does, または says he’s going to do. This is his thing, and he never actually does any of it, so, whatever. Alex is sure it’s not a big deal. It’s like how Justin is always saying he’s not going to help her get out of trouble, または that he’s going make her do actual work, または that he’s going to turn her into the authorities. He doesn’t mean any of it, not ever, so Alex is pretty sure this whole, ‘going to college far away thing’ isn’t going to happen either. It’s just one of those Justin things, one もっと見る way of reminding them all how smart he is, as if they could forget, one もっと見る threat he makes that doesn’t actually mean anything.
Still, she can’t just let him say things like that and get away with it. She has to fight with him about it, has to tell him how ridiculous he’s being, because that’s how this works. So, when he’s sitting on the couch, 読書 boring pamphlets on boring colleges in boring far away places, Alex sits down beside him, pulls one out of his hands, and rolls her eyes.
“Justin. We already live in New York.” She says. He sighs and turns to face her,
“So?”
“So it’s New York. People grow up and come to New York. They don’t grow up and leave it.”
“Did あなた just admit that I’m an adult? A grown man?”
“You’re not even a half grown man.”
“I will have あなた know that I’ve been working out, and the other day, I had facial hair. Had to shave it,” Justin says, looking all stupidly proud of himself.
“I’m sure that was thrilling, but, seriously, aren’t there like, a million colleges in New York?”
“Well actually there are-” Justin starts, pouting a little. Alex cuts him off.
“I don’t actually care how many of them there are. But あなた should pick one of them.”
“Why?”
“Because they’d be in New York,” Alex says.
“But, what if I want to see somewhere new?” Justin says, looking all earnest now.
“We live in New York,” Alex repeats, “What else is there to see?”
“Um, I don’t know, maybe the entire rest of the world?”
“Yes. The rest of the world filled with people going, ‘you know where I’ve always wanted to go? New York,’” Alex says. Justin kind of blinks at her, then he shakes his head and stands up. “See?” She says, “You don’t even have a comeback, because あなた know I’m right.”
“I don’t have a comeback because that was ridiculous,” Justin says, “I’m going to go look over these in my room now.” He finishes.
“Whatever. I’ll just come steal them later.”
**
Two weeks later, with the information packets she’d ストール, 盗んだ from Justin’s room and a dozen または so others she’d stolen from the mail before he could open them, Alex makes a mosaic. She cuts the buildings and classrooms and smiling college students and rolling hills up into little pieces and puts them all back together until she’s created New York. It’s all in panels, one for the skyline, another for each of her お気に入り streets, a few for places she knows Justin loves, one for the sub ショップ itself. It’s not like, the best thing she’s ever made または anything, but she kind of likes it, and when she’s blowing off History to finish it in the art room one 日 at school, because she’s completely out of glue at home, Mr. Laritate walks in and tells her he loves it. He raves about it for a few minutes, telling her at least three times that he doesn’t even mind that it doesn’t have cowboys in it. He asks if she’d mind hanging it in the school, and Alex figures that will probably annoy
Justin even more, so she agrees. She’s still not a ファン of making her art for other people, of displaying it someplace like school, but this is different.
She hangs it up in the senior hallway, right across from Justin’s locker, and she’s making sure it’s straight when Justin walks by. He stops and stares, then steps closer to examine all the little pieces.
“Are these..?”
“Yep,” Alex says, smirking.
“I knew they’d all been disappearing!” Justin says. Alex grins again, waiting for him to get mad and for them to start a fight about this that will last all week, または at least until Max causes a disaster of some sort.
Justin doesn’t yell though, he doesn’t pout または tell her she’s irresponsible または anything like that, he just runs a hand through his hair then turns to looks at her.
“What?” She asks.
“You know, it would be a lot easier to be mad at あなた if this wasn’t so good,” He says. Then he kind of half smiles and turns and walks away, and Alex doesn’t know what to say to that. Not at all.
**
One night, after Justin has spent the 日 actually filling out applications and 書く essays for stupid, far away colleges, Harper comes over, and they put on Clueless. Justin makes fun of it, rolls his eyes and calls Alex shallow, but then he makes ポップコーン and sits down with them, hooked pretty much instantly. They sit in silence for a little bit, saying a few lines along with the movie but mostly just sitting, until, on screen, Cher says,
“Shouldn’t あなた go to an East Coast school? I hear girls at NYU aren’t at all particular,” and Alex grins and steals a handful of Justin’s ポップコーン and says,
“Hear that Justin? NYU sounds perfect for you.”
“Funny,” Justin says, rolling his eyes.
“Oh my gosh, Justin!” Harper says, turning around, “You should totally go to NYU, because I was thinking about applying there, and then we could go together, and be college buddies, and I could make us outfits in purple, または with bobcats on them, and we could walk to class together and get coffee together, only I don’t drink coffee, but あなた could get coffee and-”
“Harper,” Alex cuts her off, “stop.”
“Sorry,” Harper says, blushing a little. Justin shifts a little in his seat, looking slightly uncomfortable, but the movie grabs all their attention again a few 分 later, things are normal again.
**
While Justin is interviewing somewhere much too far away, Alex considers paying an elf to come pretend to be his girlfriend, and make him stay home. It’s a good plan, really, Justin wouldn’t be able to resist, and there would be an elf around all the time, which would be kind of perfect. But, Alex doesn’t really want to have to pay someone to take care of this, even if she would be using Justin’s money. She’s pretty sure getting Justin to stay shouldn’t be so much work, または any work at all, really. (And besides, she’s pretty sure that eventually someone would catch on to the whole elf thing, and then everyone would be all mad at her and blah, blah, blah.) So, she just throws a lot もっと見る コメント about New York being amazing and about college being lame anyway around when Justin gets home.
He pretends to ignore her, but she knows he’s listening.
**
One night, when Justin has actually gotten acceptance letters from several colleges and has been discussing them with their father in the キッチン for hours, Alex storms in,
“What about the Wizard competition?” She demands. Justin stares at her.
“What about it?”
“How can we have it if you’re not here?” She asks, and she knows, she knows what a ridiculous 質問 it is, but she’s feeling so frustrated and angry that she doesn’t care. Justin raises his eyebrows so high they
almost hit his hairline,
“Magically?”
“But あなた won’t be here!”
“The Wizard completion won’t be here! And I can get to wherever it is magically, and it doesn’t really matter, because even if I don’t 表示する up, I’ll win.” Justin says, crossing his arms over his chest. She glares at him.
“Whatever,” she says, turning on her heels and walking away. Later, she thinks that might be the first fight they’ve ever had that she’s actually lost, and it makes her chest ache, and she hates it.
**
Justin is packed, he’s packed and he’s making lists and checking them fourteen times to make sure he has everything he’ll need when he gets to the college Alex always pretends to not know the name of. It’s a lie; she’s at their website every day, glaring at the countdown to freshman orientation clock and wondering how to curse an entire university, but saying it out loud, giving it a name, just makes her angrier. She’s started leaving the room whenever it comes up, which means she’s been spending a lot of time によって herself because all her parents can talk about these days is Justin and college, and it’s driving Alex crazy.
She can’t believe it’s actually happening, that he’s actually leaving, but half is stuff is already in boxes and their mom is cooking all his お気に入り meals and they’ve even hired a new waiter to work at the sub station.
The new guy’s name is Zack, and when Alex isn’t in her room glaring at the computer, she’s sitting in the restaurant, flirting with him. He’s not all that cute, and she’s not actually into him, but it gives her something to do, and it makes Justin really angry, something about keeping Zack from his work, so she keeps it up. He tries to actually ask her out a few times, and she turns him down with various excuses he seems to believe. Then, the 日 before Justin is supposed to leave, Alex and Zack are alone in the shop, and he sits down with her and grabs her hand and tells her how hot she is and then he leans フォワード, 前進, 楽しみにして and kisses her, and ew. Alex is bored before it even really begins, and they’re still in her family’s restaurant, and she should really push him off and yell at him for this, but then she hears footsteps. Justin’s footsteps. So, she throws her arms around Zack’s neck and scoots closer to him and braces herself for the way Justin is about to totally freak out. He doesn’t disappoint her.
“ALEX,” He yells, storming over to them, almost running, he grabs Alex’s arm and pulls her up out of her chair.
“Chill out, dude,” Zack says, glaring at Justin. There is a 秒 then, when Justin bristles and lets out a long breath and when Alex actually thinks he’s going to hit Zack, that he’s actually going to パンチ him, but then it passes and Justin relaxes, just a little.
“You,” he says to Zack, “are fired. Get out.”
“You can’t 火災, 火 me!” Zack protests.
“Actually, I can. And I’d leave before I tell my father about this if I were you,” Justin says. Then, before Zack can say anything else, Justin tugs on Alex’s arm and pulls her back into the kitchen.
“You’re not really going to tell dad, are you?” Alex asks, shaking out of his hold. Justin glares at her.
“What was that?” Justin demands.
“See, Justin, I know あなた don’t have much experience, but that’s what we normal people call kissing,” Alex says.
“You don’t even like Zack!” Justin says, ignoring her last comment.
“Sure I do.”
“No. あなた don’t. I can tell.”
“Whatever. I can キッス whoever I want,” Alex says.
“Not in the middle of the sub ショップ at two in the afternoon! Not people あなた don’t even like! Not guys like Zack.”
“What’s wrong with guys like Zack?”
“Everything,” Justin spits.
“Daddy liked him. He hired him,” Alex protests.
“Dad liked him because he was ok with getting paid in sandwiches.”
“Whatever,” Alex repeats, “Are we done?”
“No. We’re not. I still want to know why あなた were キス Zack.”
“Why do あなた care?”
“Sub Shop. Two in the afternoon. New employee. Not a good guy. あなた キス him.” Justin lists, talking slow like it should be obvious.
“You’re leaving tomorrow,” Alex says.
“What does that have to do with anything?”
“Tomorrow, you’ll be gone. Then I can キッス the entire school and you’ll never know.” Justin stares at her, looks her up and down like he’s trying to figure her out.
“I don’t understand what my going to college has to do with あなた キス ランダム guys,” He says.
“You’re leaving,” She says again.
“And you’re what, punishing me?”
“Maybe. Is it working?” She asks, and his eyes flash and her stomach flips in anticipation because this is really getting to him, really upsetting him, and that’s all she’d wanted.
“You know what, Alex?” He fumes, “I don’t have time for this. You’re right. I’m leaving tomorrow, and it would be really nice if あなた could just happy for me. If for once in our lives あなた could act like me getting something good wasn’t somehow terrible for you. If あなた could be excited with me. But I guess that’s too much to ask for,” He finishes, storming out of the kitchen, leaving Alex speechless. Again.
**
Justin doesn’t speak to her for the rest of the day, like, actually doesn’t speak to her, not the normal not speaking to her when they just argue more. Their parents exchange worried glances, and even Max looks really confused. Alex tosses and turns in bed, angry and sad and this is not how things are supposed to be.
He’s leaving, he’s actually leaving and he’s actually mad her and she doesn’t know what to do. He can’t leave, can’t leave her here to fix her own messes and get herself out of trouble, can’t leave her here with no one to fight with, can’t leave her here with no one on her side. She’s so restless and so furious and so hurt she can’t stand it, so, at around midnight, she gets out of ベッド and walks to Justin’s room. She just sits on his ベッド and stares at him for a second, trying to figure out what to say, how to wake up him, but then he throws he totally off によって speaking first.
“What do あなた want, Alex?” He asks, not even opening his eyes.
“Are あなた really mad at me?” She asks. He sighs and opens his eyes and sits up, just a little.
“You’ve been meaner to me this summer than in our whole lives, you’ve been snapping at me for weeks, あなた flat out told me in キッチン あなた kissed Zack just to make me angry, and you’re worried about me being mad at you?”
“Yes.”
“I don’t know. Are あなた mad at me?” He asks, sighing again.
“Kind of,” She admits.
“Kind of? Why?”
“Because you’re leaving.”
“So?”
“So あなた 発言しました あなた wouldn’t,” Alex says, and then regrets it, because she really hadn’t been planning on going there, hadn’t been planning on admitting any of the things that come along with going there. Things about missing him and stuff, but now it’s out there and Justin is sitting up completely and staring at her.
“What are あなた talking about?” He asks. Alex looks down at her hands, then at his comforter, then at his walls, and tries to think of a way not answer him, “Alex?” He prompts after a minute, voice all soft and sincere like it had been then, and she can’t stop herself.
“You 発言しました you’d never leave me,” Alex says, “That あなた could never leave me.”
“What?”
“You said. When we had to have the wizard competition early and I won, and then あなた didn’t remember me, あなた started to lose your memories and I asked あなた not to leave me and あなた 発言しました あなた never would.”
“Alex-” Justin starts, but Alex cuts him off and keeps going,
“You 発言しました あなた never would, あなた didn’t even remember who I was, but あなた 発言しました あなた knew あなた could never leave me. And now あなた are. Now you’re leaving and that’s not how it’s supposed to be, we have to do things together, me and you, あなた 発言しました that too, remember? We can do impossible things and fight our way through jungles and get our parents back together, but only because we’re together. And I know あなた have to go to college, and I know you’re smart and あなた deserve it and I know it’s supposed to be a good thing, but あなた didn’t even ask me. And あなた 発言しました you’d never leave,” Alex says, her words all in a rush, a thousand things she’d never meant to say out loud, things she hadn’t even let herself think, and now they’re out and Justin is staring at her, just staring and staring and part of Alex just wants to run.
“I remember,” He says after a minute.
“You do?”
“I’d forgotten until あなた 発言しました it, but I remember now. We were so scared, and I couldn’t remember anything, but あなた were there, and あなた were begging me not to go and I-”
“And あなた what?”
“And I didn’t know anything, didn’t know who I was または where I was または who あなた were, but I knew I- knew I loved you,” Justin says. Alex smiles, just a little.
“Yeah?”
“Yeah. But it wasn’t like,” Justin stops and shakes his head, “do あなた remember, when all that was happening and we were trying to find the stone of dreams and there were those times, just for a second, when I’d look at あなた and forget あなた were you. Only not really, because I knew あなた were you, I just didn’t know あなた were my sister.”
“What?” Alex asks, even though she knows exactly what he means, and even though this, even もっと見る than the missing him thing, is somewhere she never wanted this conversation to go.
“It was like that at the end- I knew I loved あなた and I couldn’t leave you, but I didn’t know why, I didn’t know あなた were my sister, but あなた were あなた and I couldn’t,” Justin says.
“But あなた can now,” Alex says, “and あなた know exactly who I am.”
“I’m not leaving you, I’m going to college, there is a difference.”
“It doesn’t feel like it,” Alex says. Justin grabs her hand and tugs her a little closer.
“There were times, in the jungle, によって the fire, when I forgot あなた were my sister,” he says.
“We covered that already, Justin,” Alex says, but she shivers a little anyway because she gets it. She knows what he’s saying.
“I still forget some days. Just for a second, sometimes, when I look at you. I forget,” he admits, and who knew Justin could be so brave? He’s gripping her hand tighter now, and there is this look in his eyes she hardly ever sees, that one where he’s made a decision, but one he’s not all that sure of, one he thinks could get him trouble, get them all in trouble. (Last time she saw it he was telling her how he’d had to let Juliette go with that mummy.)
“Why?” She asks, and no, her voice isn’t shaking, because she’s Alex Russo, and things like that don’t happen to her.
“Because I’m thinking about this,” Justin says, and then he’s キス her. Then they’re キス and Alex’s entire body is reacting and when she pulls away a 分 later she’s so overwhelmed she doesn’t know what to do with herself.
“Oh,” She manages, breathing heavy, ハート, 心 racing.
“Yeah.”
“So, this is really scary, right?” She asks. He nods.
“The scariest thing we’ve ever faced.”
“You can’t leave me alone with it,” She says, and it sounds pathetic and clingy, but this is Justin, and he won’t care.
“I’m not. I have breaks and summers when I’ll be home. And we have magic. あなた can come see me,” He says, running his hands through her hair. She nods. It’s not the same, not the same at all, and there is a little part of her that is still so angry with him, but it’s smaller now, hurts less. Still, she has to know something,
“You’re not leaving because of this, are you? Because of when あなた forget?” She asks, vocalizing something she’s been wondering all along at the back of her mind and late and night at when she’s really, really mad at him.
“That should be why I’m leaving, but I’m not strong enough for that,” He says, and then he catches her eye, and she nods, and they キッス again, and Alex has to stop herself from actually, physically clinging to him.
It’s almost surreal, the way it’s finally happening, the way it’s so, so wrong and so weird, and yet perfect and not weird at all. It makes part of her wonder why they didn’t start キス years ago, even though, obviously, she knows exactly why. There are probably a million things they should talk about, things they should say, but she’s pretty sure talking about it all is Justin’s job, and he’s leaving in the morning, and they don’t have time. So she just keeps キス him back, キス and キス and falling into him, and when they finally pull apart, he tugs on her arm and pulls her down into ベッド with him and wraps an arm around her.
“Stay here?” He whispers.
“Duh,” she returns, smiling. He kisses the back of her head, and her ハート, 心 goes all stupidly girly and melty.
“I could never leave you,” He whispers, pulling her close, and even though he’s doing exactly that in like, five hours, right now, Alex can convince herself they’ll stay like this, wrapped in his covers and each other, forever.
