So I kind of need help... *Come help me*

こんにちは girlies so I've been working on this BL fanfic for like 3 months and I finally finished the first chapter (after not working on it for at least a 月 *le sigh*) but I need someone または multiple someones to read it to 1. See if it's any good and 2. Check for spelling errors/canon errors/ errors in general. I'm still kind of working on it but I really want some input. So is anyone up for it?

Warnings:
-This chapter isn't necessarily BL-centric (it's Lucas's thoughts) although I'd say it gets to it towards the end
-It's a "song fic" set to Last キッス によって Taylor Swift
-I've tried to stay as true to character as possible so there won't be any Peyton/LP bashing and there will probably be some pro-LP/Peyton things (if not in this chapter definitely in the future)